Talin thought about that as they watched Tammy's little boys tackle a tolerant Jon to the ground while Noor grabbed the ball and ran. "Maybe it was your apparent weakness that had the catalytic affect."
Sascha tilted her head slightly to the side. "In what way?"
"You were seen as weak, but you got out. Maybe now, others who never imagined they might beat the Psy Council...maybe now, they think that they can, too."
"I never thought of my perceived 'flaw' as a positive."
Talin shrugged. "I'm no expert - "
"But you are very good at picking up and reading nuances of emotion," Sascha interrupted. "Who knows, perhaps you had an empath in your family tree."
Talin shook her head. "I'm human and I'm happy with that."
"You should be," Sascha said, eyes beginning to refill with stars. "Without humans, the Psy and changelings would have destroyed each other eons ago, Silence or not."
"That's what Clay said." She smiled at the memory of his tenderness, even as fear twisted up her gut. A sharp whistle made her look up. Dorian blew her a kiss. She scowled, but she was charmed. "That man is too gorgeous for his own good."
"He's different when you're around, you know."
"I don't understand."
"He flirts with you."
Talin colored. "He flirts with you, too."
"I'm his alpha's mate. I'm still not quite sure what that means to the unmated males, but it gives me a unique status in terms of what they expect and what they'll accept from me, affectionwise."
"He doesn't seem hesitant about touching," Talin ventured, having learned how important tactile contact was to changelings. As it was to her. To her surprise, she craved touch, could laze there like a cat herself and let Clay stroke her all day long. The image made her body melt.
"No, but this is the first time I've seen him act the way he does with you - he treats Brenna like a sister, Rina, too."
"What about Mercy and Tammy?"
"Mercy's not a woman," Sascha said, then laughed at Talin's look. "Not to Lucas and the others. She's a sentinel before anything else, and she'd be the first one to remind you of that. As for Tammy, Dorian's known her since childhood, but you, he treats like a woman. All that charm..." She shook her head. "I had no idea he could be like that."
"He knows I'm with Clay," Talin felt compelled to point out. "It's not anything - "
"Oh, no, that's not what I meant," Sascha interrupted. "Dorian would never poach, and if anyone else tried, he'd shred them on Clay's behalf, no thanks required."
Talin grinned at the cardinal's arch tone. "That's what I thought. Maybe you're just seeing a new side of him?"
"I think you're right." Sascha put down her mug. "I came into his life at a time when he was pure anger - after he lost his sister. I never knew him as he was before. Maybe part of that Dorian is coming back."
"He hasn't stopped being angry." Talin watched that golden head as he bent to pick up one of the twins and throw him over his shoulder.
"No." There was profound sadness in Sascha's voice, until Talin could almost feel the pain of it in her own heart. Then the cardinal shook her head. "But enough about Dorian. He'll probably snarl at us both for daring to care." A small smile. "How about you tell me what's bothering you?"
Talin wasn't surprised at the other woman's perceptiveness. "I'm mated to Clay."
"I know."
"How can that have happened?" she asked, frantic. "I'm sick and - " And she'd been selfish. "I wanted him to love me, but I never intended to kill him."
"When I was going through the mating dance with Lucas," Sascha said, sympathy in every syllable, "Tammy told me the process is different for every couple. What does seem consistent though is that the female has to accept the bond in some way for it to come into being."
"But I didn't! I would have never willingly put him in that kind of danger!"
"Um, Talin, this is kind of personal, but Lucas says you smell of Clay."