My Rebound (On My Own #2) - Carrie Ann Ryan Page 0,56
said it out loud.
“Not that I have an opinion.”
“No, you’re allowed an opinion. It’s more the fact that I can’t make them not hang out. They’re friends, and I think my mom is finally getting it through her head that Sanders and I will never be together again. It’s going to make for an awkward summer and holidays for them, but I don’t care. I’m not going to be with Sanders ever again. My parents just have to get that through their heads.”
“Have you told them about us?” I asked, wondering why I even asked.
She blinked. “Actually, yes,” she said and then winced. “I talked about class, and I brought you up a few times because you’re part of my life, and then it just kept going. My mom got the idea that I talk about you too much,” she said and blushed.
I leaned forward and ran my finger down her cheek. “I like that,” I whispered.
“Well, anyway,” she said, but she kept biting her lip, “my parents know about you, but only that we’ve been hanging out. Because that’s an awkward conversation that I’m not in the mood to get into.”
“I figured that out,” I said and cleared my throat. “My parents don’t know about you. Mostly because I’m not talking to them much at all right now. I mean, I’m trying to talk to my mother and aunt,” I added, “but Mum feels weird, and now I know why. I didn’t want to throw a new relationship in her face.”
Mackenzie’s smile softened.
“You’re a good guy, Pacey.”
I shook my head. “Not all the time. Before you walked in, I was having this lovely little daydream about exactly how bad I could be.” I crooned the words, and she blushed.
“I thought we were supposed to study,” she whispered.
“Oh, we can study. I’m sure there are lots of things we can study.”
She lifted her chin and laughed, shaking her head. “You’re terrible, but I kind of like it.” She let out a breath. “I just wanted to let you know that I do have coffee with Sanders scheduled for tomorrow. I didn’t want you to think I was going behind your back if anyone saw us. I want closure, if that’s what he wants. Or to tell him to his face that he can fuck off if he wants to get back together.”
I swallowed hard and nodded. “That works. Thanks for telling me. Seriously. I like that you feel comfortable letting me know.”
“Of course, I would let you know,” she said softly. “I’m not going to keep things from you, Pacey. We’re friends. And friends don’t lie to each other.”
Friends. I liked being friends with her. I didn’t know what the hell I was thinking wanting more. We shouldn’t want more. And yet, I did.
I was losing my damn mind, and I needed to stop stressing. I needed to live in the moment, something I wasn’t good at, even though people thought I was.
“Do you want me to go with you?” I asked, blurting out the words before I even realized I was doing it.
She smiled softly. “It’s during your one o’clock class, or I’d say ‘yes’ in a heartbeat. Mostly because someone needs to hold me back from strangling him.”
“You know, I kind of like that you’ve already thought about this.”
“Of course, I did. Sanders was my friend and boyfriend since we were five, possibly before that if you count the cradle joke that I used to use all the time, annoyingly.”
“Nothing was annoying about that,” I countered.
“Maybe, but I still think it was, especially in retrospect. I don’t know. I have to figure out how I feel, beyond the anger. Maybe it’s disappointment? For wasting so much time?”
“Is it wasteful if you figured out who you were along the way?”
She blinked and smiled softly at me. “That’s a beautiful thing to say. And I kind of like that idea, rather than me feeling like I wasted my entire life trying to build a future with a guy who was just a piece of shit.”
“You know, maybe you and my mother should meet,” I said dryly.
Mackenzie’s eyes widened. “Oh, well, um…”
I laughed and shook my head. “Stop, I was only teasing. You’re welcome to meet my parents, though I don’t know if you really want to meet my dad. I thought he was a great guy. I was wrong. My mother, though, she’s pretty fantastic.”