want the growls, hisses, and every other sound I can get out of you, too.”
“Screaming.”
Sebastian stumbled a step. “What? Screaming?”
“Lynxes scream at each other as part of the violent little dance involving the creation of litters of kittens. Or for practice for the creation of litters of kittens. There is a lot of screaming involved. My parents notify everyone within at least a mile when they’re going at it as lynxes. The screaming is far less noticeable when they’re humans, but nobody even bothers calling the cops anymore. There’s a permanent note over at the police station that any screaming coming from the Wells property is probably a warning of more Wells kittens on the way. The louder and longer the screaming? The higher the chance of a new litter in development. If there’s a report of domestic violence at my parents’ place, the cops check the neighbors’ porches to see if there might actually be a problem. If there are lynxes piled on the porches of various neighbors’ porches, they just return to the station. It’s not worth pissing off amorous lynxes to confirm it’s just lynxes being lynxes.”
Sebastian snickered. “We’re going to need to get a home sufficiently distanced from our neighbors. Lions are loud. I’m amused I need to worry about if lynxes are louder.”
“I’m pretty sure we take the top prize for being loud and creepy. Lynxes sound horrifically like someone is being flayed alive. A lion’s roar? Loud but generally not a problem unless you’ve just pissed off a lion and you don’t want the lion pissed off at you. Me? I like pissing off one specific lion. I do not want other lions roaring at me.”
“That is because you’re smart.”
“Sebastian, I pissed you off for fun because I’m my mother’s daughter and the idea of getting my ass handed to me by a big, muscular lion is highly attractive. That is not smart. Kinky, possibly. But not smart.”
“It’s smart because the lion you like pissing off for fun has no interest in harming you. You were just using alternative flirtation methods because simpering or fluttering your lashes is not one of your skills.”
While I’d assumed Sebastian’s complaint our room was twenty miles away from the elevator counted as a minor exaggeration, we hiked down an endless hallway to the end, where a set of double doors had our room number on them. “I’ve screwed up somewhere, Sebastian. Those doors are single, and they have numbers that aren’t ours. This room has two doors, but the number matches ours. I know I indulged, but I don’t think I double-door indulged.” I winced at the panic in my voice. “I’m pretty sure I didn’t indulge in this sort of room, Sebastian.”
Sebastian took the keys from me, inserted the card, and the red light turned green. He opened the door and peeked inside. “The keys work, so this is definitely the right room. Oh. This is really nice, too. Perfect for a lion to lounge between long sessions of pampering his lynx. If you’re worried, I’ll talk to the front desk to make sure everything is okay, but I’m pretty sure it is. Hotels do this sometimes.”
“This?”
“Upgrade rooms. If a penthouse suite is empty, they’ll bump a guest up, especially if the guest has purchased a higher quality room already. Was the room charge what you expected?”
My face flushed. “I didn’t even bother looking. I prepaid the actual room fee and spa fees. I pay the resort fee at the end.”
Sebastian set the bags down, grabbed hold of my wrist, and pulled me inside. “More enjoying, less panicking. If it’s not a free upgrade, covering the difference will be my contribution, as apparently, someone paid for two people to enjoy the spa without having a planned guest with her.”
Oops. “I’m not good with money and vacation planning, apparently. I didn’t know what anything on the brochure meant. I just assumed expensive was good, and the website gave me all sorts of spa options, so I clicked them all.”
“You’re something else, my little lynx. Did you happen to tell your family which spa you were going to?”
I thought about it. “Probably, to prevent the whining and the crying.”
“And your family was overwhelmed with guilt they hadn’t sent you to Hawaii, correct?”
“A laptop, several thousand in cash, some makeup, and games for my new laptop. The cash was too much, but I think Uncle Henry provided most of it, because my parents? They can’t afford much of anything with