after all, that my ravenous desire to have her was second to her.
I closed my eyes, letting my nose take over.
Deer, I groaned. Ugh.
I still raced towards it and quenched my ever burning throat, letting the warm blood soak into my dry and frozen throat. Gluttonous. That is what I had become. If I shook myself you might even hear the blood slosh around in me.
But, there was no blood that would ease this ache...this hollow yearning. I pushed the animal off of me with disgust and realized my need for a shower and fresh clothes.
When I arrived at home I ran into Rosalie in the garage.
Great, I thought. Exactly what I need.
"You know this is going to cause problems, Edward," she hissed my name.
"Not now, Rosalie." I growled back.
"You are so self-centered, haven't you thought about what this will do to our family?" she bit back at me.
Of course I had thought about it. Wasn't it obvious that it was eating at me, every second of every day? It was only earlier that I admitted my betrayal.
She must be bored - this argument was getting old.
"Rosalie, go jump off a cliff," I snapped back at her, not like that would do much to her; maybe ruffle her hair and clothes - that should piss her off.
I chuckled at my internal thought.
Ignoring her jibes and muttering I continued to walk inside. Everyone else was pointedly ignoring me. It was apparent that they were all acting busy. I saw through the pretense but I was relieved they were leaving me alone.
I was swiftly dressed and back at Bella's before Charlie left, parking my car around the block so it would be out of sight. I raced towards her house, hoping to hear something new today.
Lurking in the shadows outside her house, the feeling of being a stalker came over me again. Was this how I would forever live my life - being a crazy vampire stalker?
Catching the tail end of their conversation I reprimanded myself for letting Rosalie distract me, taking away a considerable amount of my time. My stalking time, I laughed mirthlessly at myself.
Feeling a little belligerence because I failed to get back before her thoughts were being spoken, I listened with more effort....eavesdropping on their conversation more tentatively.
"I'm not going to the dance, Dad." I heard the stubbornness in Bella's tone as I imagined her vulnerable face creasing with anger. Her kitten anger.
I chuckled.
Today seemed to be a mostly silent thought day for Charlie, but the tenor of his mind was still leaking out. Fear raged through him at the possibility that none of the boys liked her at school. What was wrong with his daughter? These thoughts were more pointless than he realized. If only he knew what all the males at school thought about her...
Even worse - what she liked: a vampire.
"Didn't anyone ask you?" Charlie asked, concerned.
"It's a girl's choice." Bella's voice was exultant with smugness.
I could almost hear the triumph in her voice as she realized she won this argument. Once again I imagined her face; her chin jutting out, her lips pursing.
Another chuckle.
Oh, how light my heart felt every second I was around her.
"Oh." Charlie huffed, disappointed.
His thoughts turned a different direction while he contemplated why she didn't like anyone at school.
She did like someone though...me. My heart leapt, my desires raced, my body ached to hold her. Enough, I ordered. Hadn't I gone too far already today?
The clattering of dishes rang out into the yard before Charlie emerged from the house. I watched as he waved, saying goodbye to Bella. I raced towards my car.
As soon as Charlie drove off I was in the driveway waiting for her, anxious that one day she will walk out of the house, see me waiting for her and then will deny me her company.
It pained me to think like this but I was still not completely sure of her feelings. Her hidden thoughts make things more interesting, I sighed, but they also drive me insane.
Bella came out of the house with a slight skip in her step as she turned around to lock the door, leaving the main dead bolt unlocked. I noticed everything about her, even the inconsequential.
As I watched her carefully, I almost exited the car to give her a hand, worried she might fall at her pace but she slowed when she saw the silver Volvo waiting for her in the drive. I felt a quick sinking feeling in the pit of