all of the soundproofing she'd tacked onto the walls in an effort to damper her ability. Looked to me like you were coping real well last night.
You didn't have to help me. I know, he said, no expression in his tone or in his face.
Why did you? How come you came back here?
He lifted one thick shoulder in a shrug. I thought you might like to know that the Order took out the Crimson lab. The lab, the manufacturing supplies, the inpiduals running the facility...all of it is ash now.
Oh, thank God.
Relief washed over her like a balm. Elise closed her eyes, feeling hot tears well up behind her lids. At least the insidious drug that stole Camden couldn't harm any other woman's son now. It took her a moment to compose herself enough to look at Tegan again, and when she did, she found that gem-green gaze fixed hard on her.
She wiped at the tears that streaked her cheeks, embarrassed that the warrior should see her break down. I'm sorry. I don't mean to be so emotional. There's just this...hole...in my heart, ever since Quentin died. Then, when I lost my son... She trailed off, unable to describe how empty she felt. I just...ache.
It will pass. His voice was crisp and flat, like a slap to the face.
How can you say that?
Because it's true. Grief is a useless emotion. The sooner you figure that out, the better off you'll be.
Elise gaped at him, appalled. What about love?
What about it?
Haven't you ever lost someone you loved? Or do males like you, who live for killing and destruction, even know what it is to love?
He didn't so much as blink at her angry outburst, just held her in a steady, unflappable stare that made her want to launch across the counter and strike him.
Finish your breakfast, he told her with aggravating civility. You should rest while you can. As soon as the sun sets, I'm out of here, and you'll be back to your own defenses. Such as they are.
He walked over to the long black trench coat that was draped neatly over the treadmill and coolly fished out his cell phone. As he began to dial, Elise had the sudden absurd urge to pick up the plate in front of her and hurl it at him, just to get some kind of reaction out of the stony warrior.
But while she listened to him call in to the Order's compound, that deep voice of his so matter-of-fact and unreadable, Elise realized that she didn't so much dislike him as she envied him. How did he manage to keep himself so cold and disengaged? His psychic gift was not so different from her own. Last night, he had experienced her torment through his touch but it hadn't laid him low like it did to her. How was it he could withstand the pain?
Perhaps it was his Gen One strength that made him so impenetrable, so totally aloof. But perhaps it was training. If it was something he'd learned, then it could be taught.
Show me how you do it, Elise said as he ended his call and flipped the phone shut.
Show you what?
You say I need to learn some control over my mind's powers, so show me what I need to do. Teach me. I want to be like you.
No, you don't.
She walked around the edge of the counter to where he stood. Tegan, show me. I can be an asset to you and to the Order. I want to help. I need to help, do you understand? Forget it. He started to stalk away from her.
Why, because I'm female?
In a move so fast it stole her breath, Tegan wheeled around on her and pinned her with his fierce predator's eyes. Because you're motivated by pain, and that's a fatal weakness right out of the gate. You're too raw. You're too swamped in your own self-pity to be of use to anyone.
Fire flashed in his gaze, then banked as quickly as it had risen. Elise swallowed hard as she registered his cutting words. The assessment stung, but it was true. She blinked slowly, then gave an admitting nod of her head.
The best place for you is in the Darkhavens, Elise. Out here, like you are, you're a liability--to yourself especially. I'm not saying it to be cruel.
No, of course you aren't, she agreed softly. Because even cruelty would imply some kind of feeling, wouldn't it?