Mess Us Up – Jaxson Kidman Page 0,35
go look for Jolie or anything?”
I grab his shoulder. “Look, bro, I appreciate your worry on Jolie. She’s out there. Somewhere. I’m going to find her. Okay? That’s not your worry.”
“I want to help find her.”
“Why? So I’ll get all soft and give you cash?”
Ado swallows hard.
Busted.
This is exactly why I can’t tell him what’s going on with Jolie.
He needs to think she’s been kidnapped.
And I need to come up with a decent exit strategy for Ado.
Again… more moving parts in my head.
“What the fuck, Mac?” Ado asks. “I never said that. I never would.”
“Don’t fuck with me, Ado,” I say. “Get out of here. Go have a fun night.”
“You know, I mean it when I say about Jolie,” he says. “I see how happy she makes you. I know you don’t like me, Mac. I know you’d rather me be gone from the crew. I know what I did. Okay? I took part in that bullshit stuff with BFH, okay? I thought I could have the chance to right my wrong. But I guess not.”
“Your heart’s only bigger because your mother is about to die,” I say. “You’re going to feel alone and you’re afraid of it.”
“Fuck you, Mac,” Ado spats.
“Fuck you right back.”
Ado walks away.
I don’t feel bad.
What I said to him was true.
Maybe people change. Maybe they don’t.
Whatever.
My mind and my night is going to shift gears in about two seconds.
I’m going to get Jolie and bring her here.
It’s not a shock that Mama isn’t thrilled with my idea.
But she understands it.
She trusts me to be safe.
She’s at the sink, washing dishes, and refuses to let me help.
I lean against the counter, facing the opposite way of her.
“I have things in motion,” I say to her. “I’m going to get Jeff out in the open and finish this.”
“Making plans without me?” Mama asks.
“No. I’m just going after an opportunity. I don’t want anything to get fucked up again. It’s too hard on you. And on Jolie. I want this to end.”
Mama looks at me. “You really love that girl.”
“I really love that girl,” I say. “How many times are you going to say it?”
“A million more,” Mama says. “Go tell your brother it’s time to dry these pans.”
“What?” I ask.
Mama turns her head. “What?”
“My brother?”
“Brother?” she asks. “What are you talking about?”
“You just told me to have my brother dry the pans.”
“No,” Mama says. “I meant Taz or Les… I thought… never mind, Mac.”
“Are you okay?”
“I had a little too much with dinner I think,” Mama says. “I’m tired. I thought Taz was here. He’s always here. He needs to get a life. Right?”
“Yeah,” I say. “He needs a life for sure.”
I push from the counter and walk through the house.
I feel like someone is sticking the rusted tip of a screwdriver into my chest.
I stuff that feeling away and go find Jolie.
She’s in the bedroom, her bag on the bed, along with the bag of her father’s dirty money.
When she sees me she runs and jumps into my arms.
We hug each other in silence longer than I’ve ever hugged a person in my life.
I can feel something coming from her.
And I’m hugging her just the same because of what I’m thinking and feeling.
I need her.
That’s kind of what this thing is coming down to.
I need Jolie.
I don’t need her pretending to be kidnapped or being chased around by guys that is revenge for something she didn’t do.
I need Jolie to be the pretty girl walking down the beach. I need to see the innocence in her eyes and on her face. I need to see the surprise on her face when something crazy happens. I need to pull her toward the fire and whisper to her that I’ll make sure she’ll never get burned.
I kiss her and put her down.
“Let’s get out of here, sweetie,” I whisper.
She nods.
I carry her bags downstairs for her.
Mama is at the back door waiting for us.
I kiss Mama’s cheek.
Mama grabs Jolie and hugs her tight.
“Don’t be stupid,” she whispers to Jolie. “And come back for a real meal once in a while.”
“I’ll be back soon,” Jolie says.
“I know you will,” Mama says.
I hold Jolie’s hand as we leave the house.
She gets into my car and I take off with speed.
Just to try and piss her off a little.
When I look over at her, she’s not mad at me.
She’s crying.
“Holy shit, sweetie, what’s wrong?” I ask.
“I’m not supposed to say anything,” she says.
“Say what?”
Jolie looks at me. “It’s about Mama Dae.”
“What