He turned, and her voice called again, somewhat breathless. “Merlin! I’ve been praying … since you went off with the High King … waiting for you to come back.”
He smiled and held out his hands in greeting. “Natalenya!”
She ran to him and, to his great surprise, fell into his arms, sobbing into his tunic.
For a moment Merlin stood there, stunned. Why would she weep? Why come to him? He thought his heart might leap out of his chest.
“My father betroths me to Vortipor tonight. To be married in Junius.”
Vortipor? How could Natalenya marry that foul-mouthed, cruel … “That’s terrible,” he said and instantly realized his mistake, for her crying increased until her arms shook.
Merlin tentatively cradled her head. The rain-fresh smell of her hair filled his senses.
“Unless you want to marry him …”
She pulled back a little, and even with his poor eyesight, he thought he saw a fierce light in her eyes. “Never!”
Merlin was taken aback. Maybe he wasn’t the only one who disliked Vortipor. But did she mean it? The man was, after all, someone important. “He’s the battle chieftain’s son —”
“I don’t care.”
A weight lifted that he hadn’t entirely realized was there.
“But what can I do?”
“Help me!”
“How? I can’t sway your father.”
“Hide me. Don’t make me go back. He’s not himself to make a decision like that.”
“They’ll hunt for you.”
She buried her face against his chest once more. “Not if I couldn’t marry Vortipor.” And her tears soaked into Merlin’s tunic right over his heart.
“Natalenya … you’d have to be married for that to happen.”
She wrapped her arms around him and held to him tightly. “Yes.”
The word struck him with greater force than if he’d been hit by the Druid Stone’s lightning. She couldn’t mean she wanted to marry him.
Hope and joy flared within him, only to drown in an ocean of frustration over his blindness. He was nothing — a glorified beggar at Uther’s table. If the king’s house didn’t bestow enough provisions for him, could he subject her to a life of toil? His heart beat like a galloping horse, and he wanted to shout, but his words slipped out one by one, like dry pebbles dropping to the ground.
“Natalenya, I love you, I do. But I can’t guarantee I can provide for you.”
She looked up at him. Touched his scarred face. “I don’t care. We’ll find a way.”
Yet the true reality of their situation pierced him like a deadly arrow. “Vortipor …” He pulled back, shaking his head. “I serve the High King now, and his son after him. I’ll be near them for years and years. Maybe for the rest of my life.”
“What do you mean? You serve your father.”
The tremor in her voice nearly undid him, but he forced himself to speak. “No. He pledged me to Uther.” He paused, and a realization struck him. “But you were there!”
“When?”
“Just before you swore fealty with your mother.”
“We’d only just arrived.” She fell silent, and he felt her soft hand slipping into his.
Merlin didn’t know what to say.
“I never dreamed you’d serve Uther,” she said at last.
“I leave tomorrow.”
“You can’t.”
“I’ve sworn my service. If you came with me … If we were …” Again he shook his head. “You’d never escape Vortipor and his father.”
Natalenya pulled her hand free and turned away. “You don’t want me.”
“That’s not true —”
“You’re afraid of Vortipor. I understand.”
“No —”
“You’d rather I marry another.”
“Natalenya, I —”
Merlin stopped. He didn’t have the words. Why had his father pledged him to serve Uther anyway? His blindness, always his blindness. It ruined his life and sucked away his joy, causing even his blessings to become deep sorrow. If only he’d known of Natalenya’s predicament and her feelings yesterday, he would have told his father to recant his promise. He wanted to tell her how much joy she’d bring him, but his words turned to ashes in his throat.
“Don’t worry. I’ll figure something out.” Her voice trembled.
He reached out, but she’d stepped too far away. “Maybe there’s another way,” he said.
“Maybe.”
“Natalenya?”
“Yes?” She turned back to him, but her voice sagged with weariness where before it had sprung with hope.
“Stay. I’ll help. But first I need your help to destroy the Stone.”
“The Stone.” She stepped closer but didn’t take his outstretched hand. “Very well, Merlin. Let us see to this Stone.”
Merlin wanted to ask about the aloofness in her voice, but thought better of it. “I’ll explain my thoughts as we walk to the smithy. Hopefully my tas is