A lump formed in my throat, but I swallowed past it. I couldn’t think like that, not here, not now. Those kinds of thoughts were saved for when it was dark outside, and I was alone in my bedroom. For now, I had to put on a front. One that made out I was doing great and not breaking apart inside.
I pushed my shoulders back and took a step forward. “Hey, Cardo!” I greeted, waving my hand in the air. I screwed up my face at the move, cringing at myself.
“Luna!” He darted over to me with Chiara hot on his heels. “I haven’t seen you in forever.” He dragged the last word out, and I couldn’t help the pull at my lips.
“I know.” I crouched down in front of them both. “I started my new college a few days ago.”
“You go to college?” Chiara asked in her sweet little voice. Her eyes were wide, the bright hazel pulling me in and threatening to not let me go.
“I do.” I nodded. “I don’t have classes today though.”
“We finished school already,” Cardo announced, pushing his chest out. “I learned my times tables today.”
“You did?” I tilted my head, listening intently. He was proud of himself, and for some reason, so was I. School had always been my savior. It was the one place where I wasn’t surrounded by chaos.
“Yeah, want to hear them?”
“Sure.” My thighs burned from crouching in front of them, so I stood. “Let’s go sit down.” I looked around, spotting the curb that separated part of the makeshift parking lot from the small patch of grass. I pointed and they both ran toward it.
Cardo stood with his hands on his hips and Chiara waited next to him, her gaze flashing from me to him and then the curb again. She was waiting to see what to do. My stomach dropped, seeing so much of myself reflected in her. I didn’t know these kids, not really, and yet I felt like my soul did.
I sat down on the curb and patted the spot next to me as I stared at Chiara. “Come and sit.”
She glanced at Cardo, and when he nodded, she slowly walked toward me and sat down. Cardo started reeling off the times tables that he’d learned, walking around in a circle as he did. I wasn’t sure how long we listened to him, but when Chiara shuffled closer, I looked down at her.
Chiara raised her hand, her small fingers running over the braid in my hair. “What’s this?”
“A braid,” I whispered, keeping half of my attention on Cardo as he jumped in the air and slammed his feet on the ground.
“Can you do that to my hair?” she asked. Her eyes fluttered shut, her body rigid. A normal person wouldn’t have seen the way hope flowed through her, but I saw it as clear as day. It was the same hope that shone in my eyes every time I looked in the mirror.
“Of course.” I turned to face her fully. “Turn the other way.”
Her eyes popped open, her lips lifting into the biggest grin I’d ever seen. “Okay!”
She spun so fast she knocked herself off-kilter. Her giggle as she saved herself from falling completely had my own lips lifting into a smile. And I realized that since I’d been out here, I hadn’t thought about my apartment and what was happening inside it even once.
I pushed my fingers through her hair, finger combing it, then split it into two sections. I started at the top of her head, knowing that she was going to look so cute with two braids.
“See?” Cardo said, walking back toward us. “I’m a math genius.”
I chuckled, nearly finished with the first braid. “You are.” I glanced back at Chiara and tied off the first braid with an elastic from my hair. “Do you know the next one?”
Cardo shook his head. “My teacher hasn’t told us that yet.”
Biting down on my bottom lip, I wondered if I would be overstepping if I told him. I opened my mouth, about to reel off the next times table, when tires squealed behind us. An SUV pulled into the lot, and Cardo spun around as Chiara sat up straighter, but neither of them moved. We all stared at it as it reversed into a self-made spot.
“Who’s that?” I whispered, not sure who I was talking to, but no one answered me. I quickly tied off Chiara’s second braid and spun