"I left my purse at the bar earlier," she admitted. "I'm going down to get it."
"You should have called for the van." He sounded like he was frowning.
"Yes, well, I thought I'd be safe enough on resort property," Carolyn muttered.
"Few places are safe for a woman alone anymore, especially at this hour," he said solemnly.
Carolyn grimaced. In the city, she never would have risked a long walk at this hour, but it was easy to forget such built-in cautions in this paradise.
They walked in silence for a bit, Carolyn worrying her lip as she tried to think of something to say. Unfortunately, the only thing she seemed able to think of just then was the kiss. And her reaction to it. And how much of a fool she was.
"I'm glad I ran into you," Christian said suddenly, and then proved he'd been thinking about that kiss too when he added, "I wanted to apologize for the way I kissed you earlier."
"Apologize?" she echoed uncertainly. She hadn't been expecting this.
"Yes. I appreciate your help in this difficult situation, and that you were kind enough to go along with it, but I realize that kiss was expecting a bit much. I caught you by surprise and apologize if my kissing you like that made you uncomfortable."
Uncomfortable? Was that what he thought her reaction had been? Good lord, he didn't know women at all if he mistook her response for discomfort.
But then, Carolyn supposed, she hadn't really responded at all other than to cling like he was a life raft on rough seas. It wasn't like she'd kissed him back or started groping him, Carolyn realized. He had taken her by surprise.
That kiss had curled her toes. It had been better than any kiss she'd experienced in her life, actually. Affected her more than anything her husband had ever done too. And Christian was gay.
She wondered what that said about her. Or perhaps it said more about her soon-to-be ex-husband's skills in that area. Robert hadn't been much of a kisser. If she hadn't seen his tongue flapping about inside his mouth over the years as he'd lectured or insulted her... well, she would have been hard-pressed to say for sure that he had one.
Certainly, it had never left his mouth for hers.
What other areas had he not been up to scratch in?
Carolyn wondered. What had she been missing out on?
If other men out there kissed like Christian... well, it seemed to her she'd been missing out on a lot.
Perhaps it wasn't really him she'd responded to, Carolyn thought, feeling a little better about the whole thing.
Perhaps had any man she found attractive kissed her with the same skill... well, maybe they would have stirred the same reaction. The thought was intriguing, because she definitely wouldn't mind experiencing that heady passion again... with someone who was feeling it too, though.
"I think we can avoid situations like that in the future," Christian continued. "I don't want to take advantage of your generosity in helping me."
Translation: He didn't want to swap spit anymore, she thought and couldn't help but think it was probably a good thing. While she did want to experience more of that passion he'd shown her, she'd rather do it with someone straight. Too much of the kissy-face business with him would just confuse her, she was sure. She was probably too new to this business to be able to separate her body's natural response from her emotions.
"My family won't think anything of it if we slip away to be alone, maybe on tours, or out for dinner and such.
They'll just assume we want to be alone. That way we could avoid the necessity for such actions and get to know each other better."
"Good idea," she said brightly, feeling much better about all of this. She was now positive it hadn't been him she'd been reacting to at all, just his skill. And being that skilled, he obviously had a lot of experience. Of course, that experience was with other men, but it was still experience.
He might be able to help her with this business of sex. Give her some tips and pointers. She obviously had a lot to learn, and Carolyn had been able to talk to Brent about almost anything. They'd never really discussed sex much, except for him to lecture her about her needing to get out, have fun, and get laid, which she'd always laughed off. But she would have felt comfortable talking about sex with him. He'd been more like a girlfriend than a male friend. Probably because he was g*y and therefore not interested. It lowered a lot of the male/female barriers when it came to talk. It should be the same with Christian once they got to know each other a little better, she thought now. Then she could grill him about kissing and other stuff she might have missed out on, about how it was supposed to be. She suspected what she'd experienced in her brief marriage wasn't the way it had to be.
"I'm glad. I'd like us to be friends," Christian said, drawing her gaze. Not that she could see much in that light or lack thereof.
"I'd like that too," she assured him, patting his arm. "I could use a friend."
"Aren't Bethany and Genie your friends? I thought they'd been friends since university?"
"Yes, but-"
Carolyn paused and frowned, unsure how to explain the situation to him. The fact was while Beth was a friend, she'd never discuss sex with her. It would mean revealing parts of her marriage it was just too humiliating to admit. And while she'd revealed all to Genie in e-mails the last two years, she already knew any mention of Robert or what had gone on in her marriage was likely to make the other woman angry. She didn't want to have to wade through Genie's upset for her, to be able to discuss what she wanted to. Christian seemed the perfect solution. He was experienced, knew nothing of her marriage, wouldn't get angry, and wasn't interested so could be like a girlfriend. It was almost too perfect.