Incrementally, his tension lessens. The rigidity fades as he cups my cheeks. “Do you hear what you’re saying? You have no basis for these accusations. Your head is filled with stress from trauma.”
I pull away. “No. That’s not it.”
His arms fall to his sides. “Yes, it is. Of course they spoke on the phone. Luther was his father-in-law. They were family. Benji is the parent to that asshole’s only granddaughter. It’s only natural you and Toby recognize his voice.”
My breathing falters. “I knew that.”
I knew, yet it slipped my mind. I knew, and still it didn’t make me back away from speculation.
“You’re grasping at straws, shorty. And the worst part is that you don’t realize the trouble rumors like this can cause.”
“No.” I’m not being irrational. This can’t be paranoia. “I never heard Luther talking to Layla or Keira. Only Benji.”
“Luther was a man’s man. He had little time for the females in his family. Ask Torian’s sisters and they’ll tell you the same thing. Their father never cared to speak to them.”
I continue to shake my head. “That might explain the voice recognition, but it doesn’t change Abi’s death.”
Luca gives a sad smile. A placating, condescending curve of lips. “I get that you don’t want to believe she killed herself, even despite what she went through. But accusing people without plausible reason will only cause more bloodshed. I need you to trust me. I need you to understand that just like you know your sisters, I know my brother better than I know myself. He wouldn’t be involved in this. Not after what we lived through growing up. You have to start telling yourself Abi’s death was an accident.”
“No.”
“Someone has to be wrong, Pen. It’s either me, Abi’s parents, the police, and the medics. Or you, on your own, without proof.”
The approach of footsteps carries from the hall and Luca turns away, knitting his hands behind his head as a light tap sounds against the wood.
“I’ve got the Advil,” Sarah says. “Want me to leave it at the door?”
“Yeah.” Luca begins to pace. “Thanks.”
There’s the rattle of a pill bottle, retreating footsteps, then silence.
Pained, punishing silence.
I don’t like us being on different wavelengths. I hate the emotional distance resembling a chasm between us.
“I know you think I’m crazy.” I clear the restriction from my throat. “Believe me, I’m sure I’d think the same if we switched places. But I can’t change the way I feel. It’s an instinct I refuse to ignore.”
He sucks in a breath, letting it out slowly. “Then I’ll talk to him. I’ll get the answers you need to put your mind to rest.” His hands fall to his sides. “But in return, I need you to promise you won’t blurt shit out in front of Torian again. Words aren’t just words here. They’re ammunition. Next time you’ve got something eating at you, I need you to tell me privately, okay? Nobody else.”
“Okay.” I grab his hand and entwine our fingers, yearning for the warm connection that comes when we touch. Even though he’s annoyed with me, the strength I gain from his presence is unmistakable. He’s like a shot of stability. “I’m sorry, Luc.”
“Don’t be.” His thumb rubs in circles around my palm. “I just have to know these things. I can’t fix what I don’t know.”
More footsteps trek down the hall.
Another knock sounds.
“Time’s up, fuckers.” Hunter’s voice carries from the other side of the door. “Big brother is about to go postal if you two don’t show your faces.”
“We’ll be out in a minute.” Luca slowly tugs me forward, making me stumble into him. Within a bated breath his lips are on mine, the exquisite softness feeling like an apology.
“It’s best if you don’t come with me,” he murmurs against my mouth. “Spend the time with Toby. Try to relax.”
I attempt to retreat, hurt by the exclusion.
“Don’t pull away from me.” He tightens his grip on my hand. “Let me fight this battle for you.”
“There’s more than one.”
“I can handle them.” He growls, oh, so protective and dominant. It’s hard not to believe him. “I know exactly what you want.”
“I bet you don’t.” I tangle my hands in his shirt.
What I want is more of this. The clear-headedness that only comes when we’re body to body. Chest to chest. Everything else fades when he’s close. The guilt. The pain. The sorrow. He wouldn’t have a clue of my desperation for more.