beat of silence where her hand freezes on my chest. “Weren’t you worried?”
“I was more worried for my brother.”
There’s another pause, then, “Did they go through with their threat to court martial?”
“You bet your ass they did. I was dishonorably discharged.”
The only stability I’d ever had in my life was gone. I’d been left with nothing. Nothing but Benji in a fucked-up situation.
“That’s a heavy price to pay for being the older sibling.”
“I’m not older. My big brother has a few years on me. Doesn’t change anything though. It’s how it’s always been. He gets in trouble, and I try my best to drag him out of it.” I place my hands under my head, feigning calm. “Isn’t that what family are for?”
“I don’t know. It’s been a long time since I’ve had one. I barely remember what it’s like anymore.” She sucks in a deep breath and sighs. “How about your scars? Are they from your time as a SEAL or from working with Cole?”
I force myself not to flinch as she makes a direct hit on a shitty subject. “That’s a long story best saved for another day.”
“You don’t want to share it with me?”
I don’t want to share it with anyone.
Not now. Not ever.
“Does it have something to do with the trauma you mentioned before?” She looms over me. “I’m not pressuring you to spill secrets… I just thought if we had something in common…”
“It’s not a conversation I want to have, Pen.”
There’s a slight tweak to her muscles. A flinch that consumes me with guilt.
“I’m sorry.” She rests back onto the bed, stealing away her touch. “I won’t ask again.”
No, I bet she won’t. She’s too considerate for that.
I’ll just be left to feel like shit for denying her.
“I’m getting tired.” She rolls away from me to wrestle with her pillow. “Good night, Luc. Thanks for everything.”
Fuck me.
Fuck me for pretending all my ducks are in a row when clearly they’re not.
Fuck me for forcing her to face her past when I barely attempt to face my own. It’s not fair. If only I knew how to function any other way.
“Night, Pen.” I reach for her, gently running my fingers through her hair in silent apology. “Wake me if you need me.”
“I will.”
I lie there for hours, staring at her black outline as she sleeps. I don’t know when I pass out, but it feels like seconds before I startle to consciousness, blinking rapidly at the sun beaming around the edge of the curtains.
I groan and reach for the bedside table to grab my cell, but it isn’t there. I drag myself to the edge of the mattress to scour the floor, still coming up empty.
Shit.
I’m going to have to get up and search for it. There’s no rest for the wicked when I need to find the asshole who shot at Penny.
Despite wanting to lie beside her forever, I can’t today.
I slide from bed, swiping my gun from beneath the pillow, and wipe my free hand over the back of my neck, getting caught up in the sight before me.
She’s peaceful, her gentle face relaxed, her beautiful lips parted.
The loud bang from the front door steals it all.
She startles, launching upright as the pounding continues.
“Luca, open the goddamn door.”
Torian.
Fucking, Torian. That’s what woke me.
“Don’t panic.” I stalk for the dresser, pulling out a pair of sweatpants and a shirt. “I can’t find my phone. He’d be having a stroke because he couldn’t get hold of me. Go back to sleep.”
She reclines onto her elbows. “Are you sure?”
“Positive.” I tug my pants on and shove the gun into the back of my waistband. “Everything’s fine.”
At least I hope so. For all I know, Decker could also be waiting at my door ready to take a dick swab. Or a vital organ.
“Sleep.” I make for the hall. “I’ll wake you when I’ve made breakfast.”
I close the door behind me and stride for the front of the house as the knocking continues. A quick check through the peephole confirms Torian is alone, suit-clad and frowning as he attempts to bang my house down.
“What the fuck?” I pull the door wide.
He scrutinizes me with a raised brow as I tug the shirt over my head. “By the look of the claw marks on your neck, I’d say you had a fun night. I hope it was consensual.”
“Fuck you.”
He laughs and steps forward, nudging past me to enter the house.