Love Forever (Love Series #2) -Lucy Darling Page 0,30
of them were Ethan.” She gives a small shrug. “You think he’s not safe but he is.” Kim gives her normal tough love.
“We’ll be here with you, too.” Mia rests her head on my shoulder. “I mean, come on. You’ve kinda taken care of me when I needed it. I know you’re going to be a great mom.” Mia gives me some of her soft love. Both of these women are so important in my life. They balance me in different ways. I didn’t have a ton of friends growing up but I know good people when I see them. I know that we’ll always have one another.
“I know. I’ll feel better when I tell Ethan. I think that’s part of why I’m feeling so out of sorts,” I admit. “This morning I mentioned kids and he kind of blanked. I want him to want our baby as much as I do.” Not to only say he does because it’s the right thing to do.
“Amelia.” Kim says my name gently. “Any man who doesn't want the baby you created together isn't worth having.”
“I know.” It would still sting. Kim keeps on going. “That said. Ethan is going to want that baby. I’m guessing he’ll be over the moon when he finds out.” I want to believe her. Hell, deep down inside of me I know that’s true, too, but the look on his face was one of slight panic at the topic.
“I was unwanted.” My head drops. I can feel my eyes sting with tears. I don’t want my baby to ever feel the rejection that I did growing up.
“You got a shit hand,” Kim grits out, angry for me.
“Others had it worse.” A tear slips free. I never cry but since I found out I was pregnant I keep springing leaks. I’m blaming the hormones. That and the fact that Ethan makes me feel deeper than I knew was possible. Kim is right. Ethan is terrifying. He has the power to break my heart into a thousand pieces. I’ve spent my whole life protecting it.
Dating men I knew I’d never love. Ones that I knew I’d never give myself to. I’ve lived sort of a lie before Ethan. Pretending that I was experienced in sex and love while holding on to that special part of me, hoping to give it to someone who loved me. I didn’t really know I was protecting it but now it makes sense. Ethan easily slipped past my walls. Both the girls hug me tightly, comforting me.
“I love him so much.” I admit the words out loud. It feels good to say them.
“Then talk to him. Max says he’s a good man,” Mia reassures me.
“I know he is. I do.” I am so inside my own head about all of this. They release me from the hug and step back. A wave of dizziness washes over me. I reach out, grabbing ahold of Kim. She grabs me, her arms wrapping around me to help sturdy myself. Mia says something I can’t make out. A moment later I’m on the sofa.
“Should I call 911?” Kim asks. I shake my head no at the same time my front door explodes open. Ethan is in front of me immediately, dropping to his knees. His hands come up to cup my face. I see Mia has her phone in her hand. She must have called downstairs to them.
“What’s wrong?” His voice is filled with panic.
“I’m fine. I got dizzy for a moment.” I think all of my emotions got the best of me. It clearly isn't healthy that I continue to hold all of this in. I never do good with uncertainty. Ethan drops his forehead to mine.
“Dollface, you have to stop telling me you’re fine. I’m trying to not steamroll you, but my control is slipping.”
I pull back, looking at his pained expression. His handsome face is lined with worry.
“Can you give us a minute?” I ask my friends, who are all watching Ethan and me.
“You sure you’re good?” Mia asks.
“I’m fine. I just need to be alone with Ethan.” The girls nod in understanding.
“We love you,” Kim says as she ushers everyone out. The door falls closed behind them.
“Dollface. I love you, too. You know that, right? I’ve been trying to show you. Whatever is going on—and I know something is going on—I’ll take care of it.”
I close my eyes, taking his words in. “It’s not enough. I need more.” I use his own words from