and almost forced into the van. I never wanted that to happen again. But if it ever did, I would have the knowledge that Arthur would find me.
If this was the insurance Arthur needed to feel calm, I would do it for him. “I’ll wear it. I promise,” I assured, and Arthur started breathing normally. He had dark circles under his eyes, and I knew he hadn’t been sleeping. He was exhausted. And strung out. And worried for me. But there also seemed to be something more. Something else.
“Have you found something out?” I searched his face, trying to understand what had triggered all of this.
Arthur closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He stepped back and pulled his hand back from my face. He lit a cigarette, took a calming inhale and rubbed the back of his neck. “Not yet. Just some things don’t seem to be adding up.” He stopped whatever he was going to say. “I think I’m going fucking mad,” he said and took another drag. “Fucking losing it.”
“When was the last time you rested? Truly rested. When was the last time you slept?”
“I can’t,” he said, dropping his gaze to the floor. “They’re fucking out there. And I can’t fucking find them. I always find anyone threatening us. But these fuckers, these snakes, they’re buried too deep. And …” He shook his head and dropped down to the bed. I kneeled on the floor in front of him.
Arthur’s eyes fixed on the bracelet, and I felt the calmness bloom around him. The steadiness of his breath when the light glinted off the silver band. “You’re scared of these men,” I said, seeing through this outburst, this obsessive need for me to have the tracker on.
Arthur laughed, and the mocking sound made my toes curl. But there was despair in it too. “Scared,” he said with another cold laugh. He shook his head, staring again at the floor as he finished his cigarette. “I’m not scared of any fucker in this town. They can come at me all they fucking want, guns blaring and shipping containers exploding. They can try and take me out—let them fucking come.” I frowned, not understanding the tortured look on his face.
Arthur’s nostrils flared and his jaw clenched. Then, on an exhale, he said, “I’m not scared of anything, including death.” He looked me dead in the eyes. “But I’m fucking terrified of them taking you. I fucking can’t breathe when I think of the cunts taking you, hurting you … killing you.”
Tears pricked at my eyes and my throat tightened. Arthur put his hand on the back of my neck and pulled me forward, his forehead pressed to mine. “My biggest fear, my only fucking fear in this whole shitshow of a world, is you being taken away from me.” His finger ran over the bracelet, and I felt his fear down to my core. Because I feared it too. I didn’t want to live in a world where Arthur wasn’t by my side.
“I won’t ever leave you,” I whispered.
Arthur’s lip curled into a small smile. “Can I have that written in blood?”
I sat back and, repeating the move I made to him in the pits, crossed my heart with my finger. Arthur pulled me to his mouth and kissed me. He kissed me and kissed me until I was breathless.
“Come on,” I said when the tension in the room had ebbed away. “Let’s get a cup of tea.”
Arthur took my offered hand and led me to the kitchen. He leaned against the countertop as I boiled the kettle and prepared the teapot. As I grabbed two cups from the cupboard, my stomach growled.
I laughed at the sound, and Arthur’s eyebrows pulled down. “You haven’t eaten?”
The kettle boiled, and I poured the water into the teapot. “I forgot,” I said. Arthur moved straight to the fridge.
He looked at the bare shelves. “This is all there is.” He frowned at the container. “What the fuck is this?” he said, pulling a pomegranate salad from the second shelf.
I smiled, and his eyes flared at my laugh. “It’s Betsy’s, I think.”
He took the lid off the bowl and grabbed a fork from the drawer. “Well now it’s fucking yours.” I went to fix the tea, but Arthur turned me around. “Fuck the tea, princess. Eat.” He scooped pomegranate seeds onto the fork and brought them to my mouth. They burst on my tongue, and I groaned. I hadn’t realised how hungry I