"But I only had time to do a few things in my vampire life. I had time to remember Stefan and love him more than ever - since I knew, then, how difficult everything was for him. I got to listen to my own memorial service. Ha! Everybody should get a chance to do that. I learned to always, always wear lapis lazuli so I wouldn't become a vampire Crispy Critter. I got to say good-bye to my little four-year-old sister, Margaret, and visit Bonnie and Meredith...."
Tears were still sliding almost unnoticed down Elena's face. But she spoke quietly.
"And then - I died again.
"I died the way a vampire dies, when they don't have lapis lazuli in the sunlight. I didn't crumble into dust; I was only seventeen. But the sun poisoned me anyway. Going was almost...peaceful. That was when I made Stefan promise to take care of Damon, always. And I think Damon swore to take care of Stefan, in his mind. And that was how I died, with Stefan holding me and Damon beside me as I simply drifted away, like going to sleep.
"After that, I had dreams I don't remember, and then suddenly, one day everyone was surprised because I was talking to them through Bonnie, who is very psychic, poor thing. I guess I had landed the job of being Fell's Church's guardian spirit. There was a danger to the town. They had to fight it and somehow, when they were sure that they had lost, I got dumped back to the world of the living to help. And - well, when the war was won I was left with these weird powers I don't understand. But there was Stefan, too! We were together again!"
Elena wrapped her arms around herself tightly and held on as if she were holding Stefan to her, imagining his warm arms around her. She shut her eyes until her breathing slowed.
"About my powers, let's see. There's telepathy, which I can do if the other person is telepathic - which all vampires are, but to different degrees unless they're actually sharing blood with you at the time. And then there are my Wings.
"It's true - I have Wings! And the Wings have powers you wouldn't believe - the only problem being that I don't have the faintest idea how to use them. There's one that I can feel sometimes, like right now, trying to get out of me, trying to shape my lips to name it, trying to move my body into the right stance. It's Wings of Protection and that sounds like something we could really use on this trip. But I can't even remember how I made the old Wings work - much less figure out how to use this new one. I say the words until I feel like an idiot - but nothing happens at all.
"So I'm a human again - as human as Bonnie. And, oh, God, if I could only see her and Meredith right now! But all the time I tell myself that I'm getting closer to Stefan every minute. That is, if you take into account Damon's running us up and down and everywhere to throw off anybody trying to track us down.
"Why would anyone want to track us down? Well, you see, when I came back from the afterlife there was a very big explosion of Power that everyone in the world who can see Power saw.
"Now, how do I explain Power? It's something that everybody has, but that humans - except genuine psychics like Bonnie - don't even recognize. Vampires definitely have Power, and they use it to Influence humans to like them, or to think that things are different from reality - oh, like the way Stefan Influenced the high school staff to think his records were all in order when he 'transferred' to Robert E. Lee High School. Or they use Power to blast other vampires or creatures of darkness - or humans.
"But I was talking about the burst of Power when I dropped down from the heavens. It was so big that it attracted two horrible creatures from the other side of the world. And then they decided to come see what had made the burst, and if there was any way they could use it for themselves.
"I'm not joking, either, about them being from the other side of the world. They were kitsune, evil fox spirits from Japan. They're something like our Western werewolves - but much more powerful. So powerful that they used malach, which are really plants but look like insects that can be no bigger than a pinhead or big enough to swallow your arm. And the malach attach themselves to your nerves and feather out along your entire nervous system and finally they take you over from inside."
Now Elena was shuddering, and her voice was hushed.
"That's what happened to Damon. A tiny one got into him and it took him over from inside so that he was only a puppet of Shinichi's. I forgot to say, the kitsune are called Shinichi and Misao. Misao is the girl. They both have black hair with red all around the tips, but Misao's is long. And they're supposed to be brother and sister - but they sure don't act like it.
"And once Damon was fully possessed, that's when Shinichi made Damon's body...do terrible things. He made him torture Matt and me, and even now I know that sometimes Matt still wants to kill Damon for it. But if he'd seen what I saw - a whole thin, wet, white second body that I had to pull out with my fingernails from Damon's spine - with Damon finally passing out from the pain - then Matt would understand better. I can't blame Damon for what Shinichi made him do. I can't. Damon was...you can't imagine how different. He was crushed. He cried. He was...
"Anyway, I don't expect to ever see him like that again. But if I ever get my Wings' powers back, Shinichi is in big trouble.
"I think that that was our mistake last time, you see. We finally were able to fight Shinichi and Misao - and we didn't kill them. We were too moral or too gentle or something.
"It was a bad mistake.
"Because Damon wasn't the only one who got possessed by Shinichi's malach. There were girls, young girls, fourteen and fifteen and younger. And some boys. Acting...crazy. Hurting themselves and their families. We didn't know how badly until after we'd already made a bargain with Shinichi.
"Maybe we were too immoral, making a bargain with the devil. But they had kidnapped Stefan - and Damon, who was already possessed by then, had helped them. Once Damon was unpossessed, all he wanted was for Shinichi and Misao to tell us where Stefan was, and then for them to leave Fell's Church forever.
"In exchange for that, Damon let Shinichi into his mind.
"If vampires are obsessed with Power, kitsune are obsessed with memories. And Shinichi wanted Damon's memories for the last few days - the time that Damon was possessed and torturing us...and the time when my Wings made Damon realize that he had done it. I don't think Damon himself wanted those memories, either of what he'd done or of how he'd changed when he had to face that he'd done it. So he let Shinichi take them, in exchange for Shinichi putting Stefan's location into his mind.
"The problem is that we were trusting Shinichi's word that he would leave then - when Shinichi's word meant nothing at all.
"Plus, ever since then he's been using the telepathic channel that he opened between his mind and Damon's to take more and more of Damon's memories without Damon even knowing.
"It happened just last night, when we were pulled over by a policeman who wanted to know what three teenagers in an expensive car were doing that late at night. Damon Influenced him to go away. But just a few hours later Damon had forgotten the policeman completely.
"It frightens Damon. And anything that frightens Damon - not that he would ever admit it - scares me to death.
"And, you might ask, what were three teenagers doing out in the middle of nowhere, in Union County, Tennessee, according to the last road sign I saw? We're heading toward some Gate to the Dark Dimension...where Shinichi and Misao left Stefan in the prison called the Shi no Shi. Shinichi only put the knowledge into Damon's mind, and I can't get Damon to say much about what kind of place it is. But Stefan is there and I'll get to him somehow, even if it kills me.
"Even if I have to learn how to kill.
"I'm not the sweet little girl from Virginia I used to be."