Lines Drawn (Drawn to You #2) - Ker Dukey Page 0,3
she won’t let me see her, comfort her, tell her my insides are corroding with an ache I can’t shift.
She was barely pregnant, and I know this happens, but I’d let myself believe, see the future. I let myself love the baby I thought we were going to have in our arms, and instead, I have nothing. Why won’t they just let me in there? She’ll be okay if they just let me hold her.
Nine fucking days and nights in this hospital waiting room and she still won’t see me. Does she blame me? I got her here straight away, but was it mine, Gav’s and Gaby’s argument that caused this to happen? Did we over-stress her? Is that possible? Fuck. I can’t wait around anymore.
My head keeps replaying that night. Her on the phone and me finally losing my shit over the thought of Gaby and Gavin going at it and being siblings.
Fuck. Everything is such a mess.
The vibrations of my cell buzzing against my leg jerks me to the present. I know it will be my mother again; she’s been calling and texting my phone since that night. Gaby has tried to see her, but she’s been avoiding her.
We need to know the truth with regards to Gaby, and she’s kept her in the dark long enough. She’s kept us all in the dark long enough.
Peeking my head around the corner to Antonia’s room, I wait for the doctor to tell her parents that she won’t see anyone, but instead, he opens her door and shows them inside. My gut twists and my fucking soul wilts from the inside. She just doesn’t want to see me.
An hour later, they reappear in the waiting room, her mother giving me a look of distaste. “We will be taking her back to her apartment in a couple of days, and we think it best that you give her some space.”
“She’s had space.”
“I’m not asking, Finlay Hayes. How much more damage do you want to inflict?”
“This wasn’t my fault,” I almost whisper, in disbelief.
“And her broken ankle? Was that not your fault either?”
“Janet, come on. Leave the boy alone.”
“No, David! That’s my baby in there suffering, in pain, and heartbroken.”
There are a thousand things I want to say to this witch, but right now, I don’t trust myself to stop at being vocal, and I’m worried I’ll wring her fucking crinkly neck. Fuck this shit. They don’t deserve a reply. I grab my jacket and march from that place.
THE POUNDING IN MY head has been constant for the last nine days. What a cluster fuck our lives are right now. I didn’t even know Antonia was pregnant, and trying to make sense of anything that night is like looking through a snowstorm for a line of coke.
Shit. My thoughts don’t even make sense.
My eyes sting from lack of sleep, and closing them and escaping into the dream world feels really appealing right now.
The pregnant woman I’ve seen here for the last four days has come back down to drag toxins into her lungs, polluting her poor kid before it even gets a chance. It should be against the law for women to smoke while carrying a life inside them. Usually, I’m not a judgmental person. Fuck, how can I be? Pot, kettle, and all that. But there are some things that just rile me up, especially when some women go through such trauma losing kids, while women like that put their needs before their baby’s health. I sound like a cunt, and she’s staring at me, daring me to call her out on it. Not my fucking business. Maybe it’s a craving or some shit.
Looking at my watch tells me visiting hours will be over soon, not that she’s seeing anyone. The doctor tells me every day I show up that she’s not up to visitors. I don’t understand why they’re keeping her so long, and Fin just tells me to go away whenever I ask him about her. He has some explaining to do but the time isn’t right, even though Gaby won’t look at me let alone talk to me, and I nearly caused a war when I confronted my family about the accusations Fin threw out there like confetti laced with thorns.
We’ve been friends for years and yet he didn’t tell me all this shit was going on and allowed me to want Gaby. He wasn’t blind to the facts there was something building between us, and instead of