But the thought of his lips on mine and his arms around me makes me feel alive, and I don’t want to give that up.
I wish I could just see into the future so I would know how this ends. I’m terrified of getting hurt again, so if I could see a glimpse of my own devastation when he walks away, maybe I could convince my heart to stop wanting him so badly.
I throw the covers off my body and exit from my little cocoon. That isn’t how life works. No one can see the future. The only way to protect yourself is just not to put yourself in a position where you might get hurt.
That logic has worked for me for years, so why does it suddenly make me sad?
“The latest,” I say, not meeting his eyes. He knows me too well, and I don’t want him prying into this until I’ve got it figured out.
He walks over to the window and takes a sip of his coffee. He’s staring at something outside with a smile on his face.
“What are you smiling at?” I ask, rising onto my toes to see through the window. Colton is outside putting a bag into his truck, and just the sight of him makes my heart skip a beat and my face flush.
“I have a feeling it’s going to be a very interesting day,” he says with a smile.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
He walks over to the kitchen table and sits down to read the paper. “Oh, nothing,” he says.
“Daddy, stop being all secret-y,” I say.
“I’m just saying you might want to go get a shower before you run out of time to get ready.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “What do you know?”
He simply shakes his head and takes another sip of his coffee. “You’re wasting time,” he says. “Just trust me.”
I look from him to the window, where Colton is now loading up a couple of fishing poles from our garage.
Is he planning to take me out today? I can’t think of any other reason my dad would be so cheery, and Colton wouldn’t be taking our fishing poles if he hadn’t come over and asked permission first.
Oh God, he’s planning something. And Daddy’s right. I am a mess.
I touch my hair and then make a run for the bathroom.
Colton rings the doorbell just as I’m braiding my wet hair. I brush some color onto my cheeks and look in the mirror. This is ridiculous. What in the world is he doing?
What am I doing?
I should tell him I’m busy, or that I’m too tired to go out all day.
But my pesky heart sends me out into the living room with a nervous little bump.
“Hey,” I say as I open the door. “What are you doing here?”
He has a mischievous smile on his face. “Good morning to you, too,” he says. “Rob.”
My dad nods and gives him a wink. Partners in crime.
I give my dad an evil look and he just laughs and makes his way back to his bedroom.
“Have fun, kids,” he says.
“What are you two conspiring about?” I ask. I step back so he can come inside, but he just hangs in the doorway, his arm propped against the threshold.
“I was thinking since it’s our day off and all, and we’ve both been working so hard lately, it might be fun to get out and do something fun,” he says.
I make a point to look around him toward the truck. “You want to take me fishing?”
“Knox said we are welcome to borrow his boat,” he says. “And your dad offered your old fishing poles. I thought we might go out on the lake and make a day of it. Your dad told me you guys used to go fishing a lot when you were younger.”
“We haven’t been in ages.”
“Come on,” he says. “I promise we’ll have a good time.”
I glance at his lips and think about last night’s kiss. A good time is exactly what I’m worried about.
“I’m supposed to be doing inventory this afternoon,” I say. “I have a million things to do, Colton.”
“A million things that will still be there when you get home,” he says. He holds his hand out to me, his eyebrows raised. “You can’t work all the time, Jo. Everyone deserves to have a little fun.”