there’s been one particular woman on my mind a lot lately? It’s just because we’re working together so much. It doesn’t mean anything.
“It really is worth it, you know?” Cammie says, a dreamy expression in her eyes as she stares down at the baby.
“You better get to sleep or I’m going to take back my offer and go play some video games instead,” I say.
Cammie laughs and shakes her head. She knows I’m bluffing, but I like to see her smile, anyway.
“Thank you,” she whispers again, and disappears to one of the trailer’s back bedrooms.
I sigh and settle deeper into the couch. The baby is fast asleep now, her pink face peaceful and still. I don’t dare turn on the TV or make any noise. I don’t want to wake her up, because I know the second she begins to cry, Cammie will be right back out here fussing over her.
Instead, I find a comfortable position and stare into that sweet baby’s face as she sleeps.
“Your mommy’s wrong,” I whisper. “I’m never going to settle down like this.”
Emma yawns again and wraps her tiny finger around mine, as if to say that no matter how hard I try to resist, someday someone is going to wrap her life around mine and never let go.
“Well played, baby,” I say with a laugh. “Well played.”
After Cammie wakes up, I head over to my place and start clearing things out and cleaning up. All of the furniture and things are my cousin Tammy’s, so there isn’t much in here that’s actually mine. I grab a big duffel bag out of the closet and start stuffing all my clothes inside.
Other than that, all I have is a few pictures and CD’s and things here and there. My laptop. Not much else. I don’t need too many things.
Thank goodness Jo’s apartment is already furnished, or I’d be sleeping on a sleeping bag for the next few weeks.
I load my bag and a couple boxes into the back of my truck and am just about to leave when I hear footsteps behind me. My chest tightens, and I turn around and cram my hands into my pockets. I was hoping to avoid a confrontation, but here we go.
“Hey, Dad,” I say.
“Going somewhere?” he asks.
“Since Tammy’s coming home soon, I thought maybe it was time I found a place of my own,” I say. In this family, a place of your own means staying right here on our land.
My dad frowns and takes a pack of cigarettes from the front pocket of his t-shirt. “Now, I told you you’re welcome to come stay with us,” he says. “There’s no need to go wasting money on a place in town. Just go on and move those things up to our place.”
I shake my head and kick at the dirt with my boots. “I appreciate it, Dad, but I got a really good deal on a place right behind the bar. It’ll be convenient to work and it’s already furnished and everything.”
“That’s what I was coming to talk to you about, anyway,” he says. “You’ve been doing real good for yourself working bars, but don’t you think it’s time you got a real job, son? You need to be thinking about setting down roots, getting a steady paying job that will help you support your family when the time comes. No more of this bartending business.”
“I like working at the bar, Dad,” I say. “I’m doing just fine.”
“Fine for a guy who’s got no one to support, but what happens when you decide you want to settle down?” he asks. “It’s your job to be the man of the family, Colton. You can’t spend your whole life partying and being irresponsible. Now I’ve been talking to my old boss. You remember Neal, right? He says all you have to do is come in and fill out a few forms, sit through an interview, and he’ll make sure you get a spot in training with the company. The interview and stuff is just a formality, but the job’s yours.”
I swallow the anger in my throat and inhale slowly. “Being a trucker is not really at the top of my list of life’s ambitions, Dad. But thank you.”
“Dammit, Colton, I’m tired of hearing this mess from you.” He throws his cigarette to the ground and stomps it out, a long stream of smoke coming from his lips. “You think you’re too good to be a trucker like your old man?”