think someone would not fancy her? I just pray that her proposing we fuck is not just her way of pretending I’m him. I’m not interested in having my knob inside a woman and having her think I’m Louis, Jeffery, or Brad bloody Pitt.
I’m quite pleased we both know the score: all this naughty contact is a momentary pleasure outlet to help us carry on. In a way, I wish I could just close my eyes and enjoy her wicked hand massage and those sweet lips; however, I’m fully aware that I can’t trust either one of us to have our eyes closed and not go to where we long to be. She, too, fights the urge with her heavy eyelids. This level of intimacy, of observing her this closely, is taking all the air out of me. I’m getting aroused in an intriguingly different kind of way, and I can’t help but want more of her. She truly does tastes rather nice and I may just kiss her all day if she lets me; after all, I have nowhere else I need to be.
“What A Feeling” by Irene Cara
Every day brings something new and today brought me Liam fucking Knight. Out of all the people in the entire world, I end up with this man, who less than twenty-four hours ago I knew nothing about. He’s rattling my insides like only one other man ever has in my worthless life. I mean, he has to be as fucked up as I am to be kissing me in bed while trying to figure out a way to get my best friend to leave her loving husband for him. Deranged fool. Are we so different? I’ve been patiently waiting for fifteen years for Jeffery to do just that—choose me! At least Liam is fine with fucking other women while he waits for Emily. Look at me, I haven’t let a single penis-possessing human touch me in almost fifteen years, afraid it may mess with my grand scheme. I’ve been a loyal, stupid idiot to Jeff my whole life. I guess I could be classified as a monogamous whore. Sometimes, I honestly wish I really were the slut I’ve been imitating forever.
Kissing him feels natural. How did we end up in this predicament, anyway? I know he has zero chance with Emily, but in his mind, he probably does, which still makes it fucked up that I’m going to let him fuck me. I’m sure that somewhere in the back of his mind, he wishes I were her. He was intimate with my best friend; that alone should be enough of a reason to stop this. I don’t even know how far those two got and now I’m letting him kiss me. I love his lips, they’re spectacular lips. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a man with such perfect lips; these lips belong on a girl. His kisses feel like heaven and I don’t deserve heaven. This is why my life is shit; I allow myself to be put in impossible situations. He will just be another lie I’ll have to tell Emily to explain my fucked-up current affairs. It’s sad that the truth, in my case, is always too painful to say out loud. It’s a good thing I stick to lies; they hurt the people around me less.
I haven’t looked away from him or closed my eyes since we started kissing. I have no idea how long we’ve been sucking each other’s lips, but honestly, I don’t want it to stop. I’m aware of how selfish I’m acting, using him for pleasure while I should be trying to get rid of him for everybody’s sake. But the way he looks at me while cupping my face and licking into my mouth makes me feel okay for being a selfish bitch. He makes me feel naked and wanted, and I need that!
“I don’t want to stop kissing you, Sara,” he whispers between kisses.
“Then don’t,” I answer and feel my cheeks blush when he smiles back.
He fixes my hair and moves to whisper in my ear, “This would be much better for both of us if we got to know each other first. I’d like to know what I’m getting myself into with you, love.”
“You’d be getting into my pussy and perhaps my mouth and other warm, wet places if you’d stop talking,” I say with a mischievous smile, glad that The Sara got the memo that her attendance was required