A Lie for a Lie (All In) - Helena Hunting Page 0,69

cupboards and my fridge.

I have to assume that all of this is from RJ. I can’t even begin to guess how much this cost. Everything is name brand or high-end organic produce. I expected to have to make time for grocery shopping this evening, and now I’m set for at least the next week, if not longer. It’s thoughtful and kind, which is more in line with the RJ I knew in Alaska.

Groceries unpacked and put away, I feed Kody, then sift through my now-stuffed fridge and debate what I’d like for dinner. I settle on a pasta dish. It’s supposed to serve three to four people, which means I’ll have plenty of leftovers for lunch tomorrow.

The muffled ping of my phone reminds me that I have unchecked messages. I leave the package on the counter and bend to kiss a happy Kody on the top of the head as I retrieve my phone. I have two voice mails, one from my mother and another from RJ.

I listen to the one from my mother first; it’s a request for a call back. She left the message less than twenty minutes ago, but if I know my mother, she’ll call again before an hour has passed. She knows I’m home from work, and she calls at least three times a week to check in on me and Kody. She wants me to come back to Washington, but I like it here. I also like not being smothered. And now I may have another reason to stay.

I skip to the next message, and RJ’s deep voice fills my ear and makes all sorts of warm tingles happen in my body. “Hi, Lainey, it’s Rook, RJ. It’s . . . hi. I’m sorry about last night. I’m sure this isn’t easy for you, and it’s not for me either. I don’t want to take Kody away from you. I just want to help and be a part of his life and yours, however I can. I sent you a bunch of stuff today, things I thought you could use. When you have time, can you call or message to let me know if everything arrived? I hope I hear from you soon.”

He’s obviously trying to show me he wants to be involved. Buying these things is . . . helpful, but it’s not the same as getting up in the middle of the night for feedings or dealing with Kody when he’s fussy for hours. The only way I’m going to know if he’s really serious about wanting to be part of his life, and maybe mine, is by allowing him to spend time with us.

I listen to the message three more times before I finally call him back.

It doesn’t even finish ringing once. “Hey.”

“Hi.” I chew on the inside of my lip, trying to summon some courage.

“Did you get my message? And all the stuff I sent?”

“I did. Thank you. Um . . . I was wondering if you want to come over? I have all this food and these boxes to open . . . maybe we could have dinner?”

“I’d love that, but I don’t want you to feel obligated to invite me over. I sent all that stuff because I want to help however I can, and I figured this was a good start,” he says softly, sounding hopeful.

“It was. It is a good start, I mean. And I don’t feel obligated. Not really. Not in the way I think you’re thinking.”

“I can be there in less than half an hour.”

“Okay. Great.”

I realize I’m still in my stupid uniform, and I likely smell fishy. I take Kody with me into the bathroom and sing to him while I shower away the eau de aquarium.

I decide to go with leggings and a long, loose shirt. I don’t want to look like I’m trying too hard, but I also don’t want to look like I’m not trying at all. I’m back to my prepregnancy weight, but my boobs are twice as big because I’m breastfeeding, and my stomach is a little less toned thanks to how big Kody got while he was in there. I have a few stretch marks left behind as an extra reminder that I’m a giver of life, and I don’t mind them one bit.

I brush out my hair, braid it while it’s still wet, and finish up by applying a little concealer under my eyes to manage the dark circles. I exhale a long breath as I