the sensation was so incredibly right, it brought tears to my eyes, and I bit my lip to keep from sobbing.
“Oh, Parrish. Baby. Goddamn, the way you feel,” he breathed. He pressed sweet kisses against my shoulder blade. “You okay?”
I nodded fervently, still unable to speak.
“No ‘Sweet candied okra!’?” he teased lightly. “No ‘Holy pickled watermelon!’? No ‘For the love of the blue swallowtail!’” He coasted warm hands over my stomach in circles like he knew I needed a minute to adjust, but it wasn’t the physical invasion I needed to adjust from.
I wasn’t sure how it was possible to feel more myself with someone else than I ever could on my own, but here I was. How was I supposed to go back to living without this in a matter of days or weeks? How was I supposed to go back to living without him?
How had this lie of a relationship become the realest, truest thing in my life?
Diesel slid partway out of me, then back in, and I couldn’t hold back a moan.
“Candied okra is horrible,” I managed, which was the world’s worst code for “please fuck me now and make my brain stop,” but Diesel got it. Of course he did. Just like he understood my humor and never made me feel small or stupid for the things I enjoyed. Just like he thought my silly sayings were adorable and my ass was made for fucking. He got me in a way no one else ever had… in a way no one else had ever wanted to.
I held the railing in a death grip, bracing against the powerful thrust of his hips as he moved inside me over and over, tagging my prostate with nearly every stroke.
“Parrish,” he said as he ran a hand up my back to clasp the back of my neck. “Parrish,” as he broke rhythm just long enough to lick a drop of sweat from my back. “Parrish,” as he finally, finally reached for my cock.
I felt my orgasm barreling toward me, amped even higher by the incredible connection between us, and it was impossible in that moment to believe that he didn’t feel it too. Something this instinctive and all-consuming couldn’t be one-sided, right?
“I’m so close,” I told him. “God, please don’t stop.”
“Not stopping. Not ever. Come on, baby.”
Diesel gave me one last perfect stroke, and that was all it took. I came with a cry, and he did too, the sound washed away by the storm.
He pulled out and quickly removed the condom before gathering me in his arms and pulling me upright with his chest against my back. He peppered my neck and the side of my jaw with tiny, happy kisses that had me laughing even as I gasped like I’d run a marathon.
“Jesus, that was perfect,” Diesel breathed, chuckling slightly. “But my knees are going to feel this for weeks. I hadn’t considered the height thing. Next time I’m gonna get something for you to stand on.” He lifted my hands to examine them and brought them one at a time to his lips to kiss. “And maybe a blanket to save your hands from the railing.”
“What I hear you saying…” I turned in the shelter of his arms and took a deep, steadying breath. “Is that you’re not ready for your porch sex merit badge yet, Camper Scout Church.”
He laughed out loud. “We can’t all be as perfect as you, Camper Scout Partridge.”
“Aww. Don’t be sad. Think how much practice we needed just to get the believable kissing down.”
He laughed again, and I decided I really loved that sound. Then he pushed me up against the railing and kissed me until I was breathless again. “Just look at us now, huh?”
“Just look at us now,” I echoed, letting him pull me against him again, and I grinned, thinking that being with Diesel felt a lot like being in the center of a thunderstorm. Wildly exciting—thrilling—but safer than I’d ever been in my whole life.
It was only later, after he’d taken me by the hand and led me through the house, after we’d curled around each other in his bed, that I lay in the dark and listened to the silence… and remembered that thunderstorms didn’t last.
14
Diesel
“Did you tell Ava about the strawberries?” I asked, fidgeting nervously with the silk noose around my neck.
“Yep.” Parrish leaned forward and pressed the elevator button. It was Monday morning, and we were in Nashville to meet with the new attorneys. Needless