‘Rose, we don’t have lines. You have a demarcation zone and barbed words like wire.’
‘And why is that?’ she answers fiercely.
‘Because I’m an idiot. And arrogant. And I thought I could take care of this before it ever got near enough to hurt you. You remember our first time here in Monaco? Remember how I said I’d never had another woman in my bed? It’s true.’
‘Because you never lived there,’ she almost whispers, her eyes looking anywhere but at me.
‘It doesn’t matter. The penthouse, the house with Amélie, the hotel—none of those beds have seen another body next to mine. Since March, I have been faithful to you. As ridiculous as it might sound, I never wanted anyone else, though I had chances.’ More recently, Amélie. At one time, I might have taken her up on yesterday’s offer, if for no other reason than to teach her how little she meant to me. But not anymore. ‘I was faithful to the idea of you. The woman who looked after me. The angel.’
‘I’m no angel.’
‘To me, you are. So, when you arrived in Monaco, it was like a sign. I’d already moved out of the house, though in truth, Amélie was rarely there. The place is like a palace, and though we lived under the same roof, we never lived together. But the day I saw you in the hallway, I moved to the penthouse, like I was like wiping the slate clean.’
‘Except you didn’t, not really. You just swept your problems under the carpet.’
‘For a little while. I thought she’d come back, and I’d tell her. That I’d buy her off, I suppose. I fully intended to tell you, but at the point where I could say the ties between us were truly broken. The problem dealt with.’
‘Instead, it came and bit you in the ass.’
‘And I deserved it. I’m only sorry that I hurt you.’ Reaching across the table, I cover her hand with mine, something unfurling inside as she allows me. ‘We punish ourselves sometimes, I think, with the kind of love we think we don’t deserve. But I want to deserve your love. I want to be worthy of you. Don’t say anything, please. Just listen because I’ve had a very, very beautiful idea. Don’t look so worried. I’m not going to drop to my knee with a ring. Unless you want to,’ I add quickly.
‘If you drop to your knee, I’m out of here.’
I find myself laughing as I top up our glasses. ‘Mon hérisson épineux.’
‘That sounded like something that requires a trip to the pharmacy to cure.’
‘I called you my thorny hedgehog.’
‘Oh, yeah. That’s super endearing.’ But she’s smiling. ‘You want me to take a risk on love, and then you liken me to a spikey rodent? My mother was right. Trying to understand men is like trying to explain what colour the number nine smells like.’
‘Men are not so complicated.’
‘Yeah, I’ve heard that, too,’ she replies cynically. ‘You have two settings. Hungry and horny. If you haven’t got a hard-on, I’m supposed to feed you a sandwich, right?’
‘Would you like to know which of those I am now?’
‘Nope,’ she retorts as she reaches for the cheese, plucking then throwing a grape my way with the words, ‘Just in case.’
I’d like to say I suavely caught it, but unfortunately, it glances off my nose, making us both laugh.
‘Thank you, but I’m not hungry. Do you have anything to help the second state?’
‘You mean Pennsylvania?’ Cupping her chin, she props her elbow on the table.
‘That’s a strange word for an erection, but I can go with it. Same with the glittery penis.’
This time, she groans, her hand moving from her chin to cover her eyes. ‘I might’ve been drunk when I ordered that.’
‘And when you hit me with it?’
Her fingers separate as she shoots me a glare. ‘Frightened.’
‘I know. But it’s all been worth it so far, no?’ A quirk of her plush lips is her only answer. ‘Can I show you something?’
‘If it’s hard or purple or sparkling or currently in your pants, then the answer is no.’
‘Take a risk.’ I grasp my glass by the rim and round the table, holding out my hand. ‘Bring your glass, if you’d like.’ My stomach tenses as the tips of her fingers touch mine. Dieu, her dress appears as though it were painted on, like someone took a delicate brush to her skin to detail the intricate swirls of lace. My gaze