a small bedroom. Her bed was a double, but the kind that was not quite long enough for someone of his height. He didn’t care. They weren’t going to sleep anyway.
He threw her down onto the middle of the mattress, breathing hard. He forgot to be gentle. Or maybe he just remembered he wasn’t.
Her eyes were round like saucers, a sudden shock of fear streaking through them.
“Turn off the light,” she said, the words nearly desperate.
He warred with his desire to see her, his desire to shield her from discomfort and his own desire to shield himself. Ultimately, he decided to comply with her demand.
He reached back and flicked off the switch, pledging them both into velvet darkness that didn’t do anything to blot out the tension between them. He had a feeling there was nothing in heaven or hell or anyplace in between that could.
He turned back to the bed, his heart setting a dull, slow rhythm, a reminder of the fact that no matter how much he wanted this, he was in control.
He’d spent the past few years feeling like he didn’t deserve much of anything, but knowing he had needs that had to be met. Doing the bare minimum to take the edge off of hunger—sexual or otherwise.
He was making a choice now, and he was doing it with grim determination. He couldn’t justify it later by saying he’d lost his mind, by saying he had been overcome. That was the easy way out. Part of him wished he could take it. But it wouldn’t be fair.
It would be giving his scarred, ruined soul a whole lot more credit than it deserved.
He took his hat off and set it at the foot of the bed. Then he grabbed hold of his T-shirt and tugged it up over his head. He could hear Rebecca rustling around on the covers.
“Stop,” he said, the word hard-won, forcing it through his tightened throat a serious effort.
“What?”
“Let me do that,” he said, instinctively knowing that she had been undressing.
Maybe he was too much of a coward to look at her. Maybe she was too afraid to let him look too. But he was going to touch her, everywhere. Taste her too.
He’d worry about the guilt later.
He stripped off the rest of his clothes, bringing a condom from his wallet over to the bed with him. Seeing as she’d been a virgin until yesterday, he hadn’t imagined she would have supplies on hand.
He lay down next to her, curving his arm around her waist, pressing his palm against her back and sliding it up between her shoulder blades. He pressed her body against his, enjoying the soft, lush feel of her.
“This is a very bad idea,” she said, her voice trembling slightly.
“I know,” he said, chuckling low and soft. “But bad ideas are all I have.”
She paused for a moment, fingertips lightly tracing shapes over his chest. “Sometimes I think I don’t have any.”
He moved his hands over her curves as she spoke. “Why do you think that?”
“I mean, I have some ideas. I have a pretty successful store. But... Not what to do with people. With men. I wanted you. But, I wasn’t going to call. This is going to end badly. And that scares me. I’m starting to think maybe a bad idea is better than nothing.”
“What would you have done if I hadn’t come over?” He asked the question, then angled his head, pressing his lips to the vulnerable skin on the side of her neck. “Tell me. What does a typical night look like for Rebecca Bear?”
It wasn’t just an idle question, not the moment the words left his lips. He wanted to know. More than that, he needed to know.
“Well,” she said, gasping as his teeth scraped her skin. “Usually I watch TV.”
“Movies?”
He felt her shake her head. “No.”
He slipped his hands over to her hips, up to her waist. “Why not?”
“Because,” she said, “they’re too long. I always think that maybe I’ll just watch one episode of something. But usually, I end up watching endless reruns on TV, and I sit there for four hours, and a movie would have been shorter.” The last word ended on a squeak when he bit down on her shoulder.
“Very interesting,” he murmured.
“I don’t think you’re actually listening to me,” she said, groaning as he soothed away the sting of the bite with his tongue.
“I’m very interested in what you have to say,” he responded, his words roughened by his arousal.