Lady Alexandra's Lover (Sex and the Season #3) - Helen Hardt Page 0,35
hands. “Lord Van Arden stopped by to call on me while you and Evan were gone.”
“Yes? Were you not happy to see him?”
Sophie shook her head and sniffled. “Of course I was happy to see him. The problem is he was not exactly thrilled to see me.”
“Then why on earth did he come here?”
“It’s all so silly really. He came to tell me that he would no longer be coming by. He has fallen in love with a common woman.”
Ire pulsed through Alexandra. “How dare he? That little snake.”
Sophie sniffed. “Oh, Ally, it’s not his fault he fell in love with someone else. I do wish I had kissed him though. I know I said I would never allow any liberties, but a girl gets curious. And who knows when I will get another opportunity? Gentlemen aren’t exactly lining up for my favors. I fear I will end up like Mother, twenty-five and no prospects due to my timid nature. I don’t want to be forced into marriage the way she was.”
Ally embraced her sister in a tight hug. “You are only twenty-three. Not twenty-five. And you know very well Mother and the earl would never force you into anything. She wants better for us.”
Sophie pulled out of Ally’s embrace. She grabbed a handkerchief out of her pocket and wiped her eyes and nose. “I know Van Arden wasn’t the catch of the season, but he was a nice man, a gentle man, and I know he would never have hurt me.”
“It seems to me he has hurt you,” Ally said.
“I meant physically. The way our father hurt Mama.”
Ally nodded. “Unfortunately, there are all kinds of hurt, Sophie. I wish I could shield you from all of it.”
Sophie gulped. “You shield me from enough of it, dear sister. I always hated how he picked on you and hurt you. May God forgive me for not being able to stand up for you.”
“There’s nothing to forgive. The man was a tyrant. Believe me, he didn’t even hurt me after a while. You get numb to it. I almost felt powerful, to be honest. It was like I had this control over him. I could make him want to hurt me, and I had the power not to be hurt.”
“You’re so strong, Ally. I envy you.”
“You have no reason to envy me. You are beautiful and smart, and any man who doesn’t want you is an idiot.”
Sophie let out a shaky laugh. “You always could make me smile.”
“What were your feelings for Van Arden? Did you fancy yourself in love with him?”
Sophie shook her head. “If what Lily and Rose said is true, and you know without a doubt when you’re in love, no, I was not in love with Van Arden. But I was very fond of him, and I think I could have been happy as his wife.”
Despite the experiences of Lily and Rose, Alexandra still wasn’t sure she believed in love. Love had never been a requirement for her own marriage. She didn’t love Mr. Landon, and she didn’t labor under any delusion that he loved her. Sophie, though, would hold out for love. And her sister needn’t worry. Ally would have plenty of money to take care of Sophie if need be. Never would her sister be forced into a loveless and abusive marriage like their mother had been. Ally would see to that.
“He is not the last man on earth, Sophie. There are others, and the right one will find you.”
“I do hope you’re right. I couldn’t bear the thought of being forced into an unhappy marriage.”
“Sophie, I’ll say it again. Mother and the earl would never force you into anything. She knows better than anyone that spinsterhood is preferable to an abusive situation.”
“Spinsterhood? I can’t bear the thought of that either.” Sophie wiped her eyes again with her lace handkerchief. “Perhaps I should have allowed a few kisses. Van Arden was never insistent, but he did ask a couple of times.”
Ally wasn’t certain how to respond. She had done her share of kissing, but it was out of her own curiosity rather than to give the gentleman in question anything. Today she had the chance to allow Mr. Landon a few more liberties, and she had wanted to try, but her heart hadn’t really been in it. Her curiosity had been sated. She had done what she wanted and more with Evan.
“If you are not comfortable with allowing him a kiss, you did the right thing,”