"Damn," I whispered to my knees, and consigned my soul to heaven.
The dream started the way it always started.
"What do you see, Corazon?"
The voice that spoke so calmly belonged to Barbara, the hypnotherapist whom Patsy had hired for our "Girls' Night In" semiannual party.
"Mud. I see mud. Well, mud and grass and stuff like that. But mostly just mud."
"Are you sure she's under?" Patsy asked, her voice filled with suspicion. Pats was always a doubter. "She doesn't look hypnotized to me. CORA! Can you hear me?"
"I'd have to be five miles away not to hear you. I'm hypnotized, you idiot, not deaf." I glared at her. She glared at me glaring at her.
"Wait just one second. . . ." Patsy stopped glaring and pointed dramatically at where I lay prone on the couch. "You're not supposed to hear me!"
"Is she supposed to know she's hypnotized?"
That was Terri, the third member of our little trio of terror, as my ex-husband used to call us.
The bastard.
"Her knowing doesn't negate the regression, does it?" Terri asked Barbara.
"Hypnotism isn't a magical state of unknowing," Barbara said calmly. "She is simply relaxed, in touch with her true inner spirit, and has opened up her mind to the many memories of lifetimes past. I assure you that she is properly hypnotized."
"Let me get a pin and poke her with it," Patsy said, bustling over to a bookcase crammed full of books and various other items. "If she reacts, we'll know she's faking it."
"No one is poking me with anything!" I sat up, prepared to sprint to safety if she so much as came near me with anything sharp and pointy.
"Please, ladies." I didn't see Barbara show any signs of rushing, but I knew she wanted to hurry us along so she could leave. "We have limited time. Corazon is in a light trance, also referred to as an alpha state. Through that, she has tapped into her higher self, her true Infinite Being, a state in which she is free to bypass the boundaries of time."
"Yeah. Bypassing all that stuff," I said, lying back down on the couch. Even though it was a dream, and I knew it was a dream, my stomach started to tighten at what was to come. "So sit back and watch the show. What do I do now, Barbara?"
"Look around you. Examine your surroundings. Tell us what you see, what you feel."
"I see mud. I feel mud. I am the mud."
"There has to be more to her past life than mud, surely," Terri said, munching on popcorn.
My stomach turned over. It was coming. He was coming. I felt it, felt the horror just on the edges of my consciousness.
"Are there any buildings or other structures around to give you an idea of what year you are reliving?" Barbara asked.
"Um . . . nothing on the left side other than forest. I seem to be standing on a dirt path of some sort. Let me walk to the top of this little hill - oh! Wow! There's a town down below. And it looks like there's a castle way up on a tall cliff in the distance. Lots of tiny little people are running around in some fields outside of the town. Cool! It's like a medieval village or something. Think I'll go down to say hi."
"Excellent," Barbara said. "Now tell me, how do you feel? "
Sick. Scared. Terrified.
"Well," my voice said, not reflecting any of the dream emotions, "kind of hungry. No, really hungry. Kind of an intense hunger, throbbing inside me. Oh great, I'm a peasant, aren't I? I'm a poor starving peasant who stands around in mud. Lovely."
"We are not here to make judgments on our past selves," Barbara said primly.
"Geesh, Cora," Patsy said, sitting on my feet. "Terri turned out to be Cleopatra's personal maid, and I was one of Caesar's concubines. You're letting down the team, babe. The least you could do is be a medieval princess in a big pointy hat or something."
I couldn't . . . because of him.
Loathing rippled through me as my voice continued. "I have shoes on. Peasants didn't wear shoes, did they?"