"Do you indeed?" Eleanor said softly.
"Are you a . . . what do they call them . . . ? " Pia turned to Kristoff.
"Guardian," he said, eyeing me. "She does not appear to be one."
"I'm not. I'm a secretary. I got zapped into the Akasha myself, and when I was de-zapped, I arranged for Alec to be brought out, as well."
"Why?" Eleanor asked.
I swallowed back the urge to shout at her that I was his Beloved, not her, and I had saved him because he needed me, chastising myself for such stupidity. I had an out in the form of Eleanor - I would be an idiot not to take that.
And leave Alec, never to see him again.
My heart shattered as everyone looked at me, curiosity almost palpable.
"It seemed like the thing to do," I said lamely, avoiding Alec's gaze, but all too aware of the swift lance of pain that shot through him at my words.
Both Pia and Kristoff looked at me as if I had turned into a giant dancing panda bear.
"I think Kristoff's right, and you're going to have to tell us what happened from the beginning," Pia said, gesturing toward a pale blue brocade couch.
As I passed Kristoff, he froze, an odd look on his face as I could have sworn he sniffed the air.
"Cora, why don't you - what?"
Pia turned a shocked expression first on her Dark One, then on me.
"What what?" I asked, wondering if I had somehow offended them.
"You're . . . you're a Beloved? Alec's Beloved? But Eleanor . . . Kristoff, are you sure?"
It was my turn to freeze. "Uh . . ."
"Cora can't be my Beloved," Alec said, rising from the love seat, much to Eleanor's dissatisfaction. His face was a mask, absolutely devoid of emotions, but I could feel them all twisting around inside him. "I don't say that we don't have a blood bond, but . . ." His voice trailed off as he glanced toward Eleanor.
"What sort of a blood bond? " she asked, her eyes narrow with suspicion.
Alec ignored her as Pia spoke hesitantly.
"But . . . but Kristoff said . . . he said she smelled . . ." Pia blinked at me.
"I smell?" My voice came out close to a shriek, because honestly, if being told you stink by people whom you were going to ask for help isn't a moment to shriek over, I don't know what is. "I don't know what . . . I mean, I took a shower.... Did I step in something? . . . Jesus wept, Alec! Why didn't you tell me I stink?"
"Kristoff is wrong," Eleanor said, her voice as hard as granite. "I am Alec's Beloved. He said I was, the first day he saw me. He was courting me, had asked my father for my hand, and I was going to agree to it, except that stupid woman with her stupid oxen came down that hill and ran me over."
Sympathy welled up inside me. I knew just how bitter she felt about those oxen and that woman. I was just as annoyed when they had run me over.... What was I thinking?
I put my hands to my head, hoping to shake some sense into it.
"No, no, you don't smell at all, Corazon," Pia said soothingly, reaching out to pat my arm. I backed away, worried that I might have some sort of hideous Akashabased body odor that had escaped my notice. Why the hell didn't you tell me I stink? I could just die!
You don't stink. You smell wonderful, like sun-warmed wildflowers.
Your nose is clearly out of whack because the others certainly think I smell. I realized that I was talking to Alec, something I hadn't done since we'd come into the house, and immediately was swamped with emotion. Can you . . . er . . . can you talk with her, too?
It took him several seconds to answer. Yes.
"I don't think I am wrong," Kristoff said slowly, his eyes filled with speculation as he looked at me. I was too busy battling a sense of nausea that followed Alec's admittance. That he could talk to Eleanor confirmed she was truly his Beloved, and made my path clear. I had to leave. He no longer needed me, and if I stayed, I'd just end up confusing myself with the desire I had for him.