Just Like That - Cole McCade Page 0,88

a hitching sound that tore at Fox’s heart. “I just need you to say that you’re willing to try. Try for me.” Tentatively, he brushed rain-slick lips to Fox’s, a feeling like lightning striking. “Try...and stay.”

If only he could make Summer feel the twisting and spiking and shuddering inside him, the earthquakes that went through his heart.

If only Summer knew what he was asking.

But...he did, Fox thought as he met those eyes that made him tremble with the fear of this, the fear of the unknown...

...the fear of never knowing what could be.

The fear of losing Summer, which spoke so much louder than the tiny nattering fears of his tired and cracked heart.

Fox darted his tongue over his lips. He’d never been at a loss for words when he chose to speak, and yet this quiet, brave young man who was asking Fox to be brave with him, to risk his heart, managed to somehow leave him fumbling, lost.

“You terrify me, Summer,” he whispered. “And I think...”

Say it, he told himself.

Say those words he’d said to no one in years.

Say those words that could break the chains he’d bound himself in.

He was twisting a knife in his own heart, and begging Summer not to make him bleed.

And, “I think that is why I love you,” he said, a rush, choked and hot and he couldn’t breathe, but he’d said it and now that those words were out he couldn’t stop even when Summer’s eyes widened, even when Summer stared at him with his expression alight. “You break me until I can’t be cold anymore...you make me feel so much, and that frightens me so terribly.” But he couldn’t let go, either, grasping on to Summer with all his strength. “But what frightens me even more is that I trust you. I trust you to take that fear...and make it something better.”

Summer let out one of those soft, sweet laughs of his, those quiet things full of light that seemed as though he couldn’t keep his emotions inside, always letting them out everywhere as if he was putting stars in the heavens, each bright glow made of feelings he couldn’t help but share to illuminate someone else’s way.

“You frighten me too, Fox,” he admitted. “Half of love is fear.” But those strong, warm hands held Fox so close, fingers weaving into the heavy, waterlogged knot of his hair. “The other half is knowing that person cares for you enough to never use that fear against you. You wouldn’t fear me at all if you hadn’t given me the power to hurt your heart.” He smiled shyly. “So all I can do is make sure I never do.”

“You know that’s impossible,” Fox whispered.

“It doesn’t mean I won’t try. As long as you try for me, I’ll try for you.” Summer’s lips pressed to his brow, the bridge of his nose...hovered over his mouth, entreating, waiting. “Because I love you, Fox Iseya...and wherever you run, I’ll follow.”

I love you, Fox Iseya.

Maybe Fox was breaking, right now.

But maybe he needed to break, to shed what was binding him, holding him locked in place, keeping him numb.

Maybe he needed to break to become stronger.

To become who he needed to be, now that he was ready to leave his grief behind.

Ready to start again.

Ready to try.

And he felt as though his next heartbeat was a fresh new thing, a different rhythm, a different timbre as he leaned into Summer, captured his mouth, whispered, “...I love you, Summer. I do. And I’ll try for you. I’ll try...and I’ll stay. So that you don’t have to go anywhere.”

Summer grinned, his mouth moving in a warm curve against Fox’s. “I don’t think we could go anywhere anyway, since I think you killed your car and I’m not crossing that river again to get to mine. So we’re kind of stuck, but maybe we could get out of the rain...?”

Fox pulled back, looking at him flatly. “I just admitted that I love you after I nearly drowned myself to get away from you, then drowned myself to get to you, and you ruin the moment with that?”

“Well, yeah.” Summer shrugged merrily. “I have to give you a reason to be mad at me to save your pride, after that.”

Fox narrowed his eyes, glaring at Summer through the water dripping off his lashes. “I take it back. I hate you.”

“No, you don’t,” Summer said, and tugged him toward the Camry, lacing their fingers together, sweetly intertwined. “You love me just as