the pleasant and conquer the challenges when they came. They were all part of the journey, right?
When they reached the fourth checkpoint—only six miles from the end for today and with four hours to spare—Angela asked for a fifteen-minute break to rest, so they all grabbed cups of water, thanked the volunteers sitting behind the table, and sat in the shade. As the sun had emerged and warmed everything up, they’d shed their jackets. Eva’s ankle felt a bit sore, but she wasn’t in any pain.
“Take a walk with me?” Marc crushed his paper cup in his hand and tossed it into the rubbish bin.
Eva did the same. “Haven’t I been doing that all day?”
“Alone.”
She looked at Angela, who had climbed onto a rock by herself, eyes closed, the breeze blowing wisps of hair across her face. “Okay, sure.”
He took Eva’s hand and led her off the trail marked with pink flags. They emerged onto a small bluff projecting from the hillside, and she finally caught a glimpse of the fabled river cutting through the valley in the distance.
Eva sat, and Marc settled behind her, pulling her close so she leaned back against his chest, his legs on either side of her, his arms nestling her in. His chin rested against her cheek. “How are you doing?”
The question ran deeper than the physical, she knew. “Okay.” She paused, gathering her thoughts. “I expected to be overwhelmed. To cry a bunch today. To be thinking constantly about Brent and feeling sad.”
“But you don’t?”
“No.” How could she explain? “I mean, I felt a lot of angst leading up to this. But it feels almost wrong not to be as heartsick today as I expected. Like I’m not doing Brent’s memory justice somehow. I mean, he should be here with us, and he’s not. Why isn’t the thought of that completely breaking me apart?”
“Maybe it means you’re finally moving forward.”
As her eyes followed the path of the rushing water, Eva sighed. “And I know that’s a good thing. It’s what I want, ultimately. What I need.” She pulled his arms tighter around her. “I mean, I love this thing we have going.”
“Me too.”
Eva didn’t want to push him away with her next words, but they’d agreed to be honest. “But while I want to move forward with you, I also don’t want to leave Brent behind.”
Marc waited a few moments before speaking, but she felt his warm breath caress her cheek. “I don’t want to either, and you know I’d never ask you to. He was a huge part of our lives, and he always will be. It’s not like people we lose are here one day and gone the next. Physically, yeah, but when it comes to our memories of them, how we carry them in our hearts—that defies time.”
“I’m so glad you understand.”
Eva turned her head slightly so she could look up at Marc. He read the thoughts in her mind and, meeting her halfway, lowered his lips to hers. Delicious warmth curled through her as she leaned into the kiss—and what might be her future.
32
Angela had never been more physically miserable in her life. Forget childbirth. At least that had been over in twelve hours.
But on day three of the ultra-marathon, her feet were run ragged. This morning, after a night of little sleep thanks to muscle soreness, she’d hardly been able to shove her swollen feet into her shoes, which she’d purchased one size bigger than normal based on the race organizers’ suggestion.
Not only that, but crossing a small river a few miles back had resulted in damp shoes. With every hit against the path, excess cold water squelched between her toes.
Squish.
Squish.
Squish.
Also, there was the matter of food, which normally pepped Angela right up. But as much as she’d tried to enjoy them, the meals Marc had chosen left her stomach scraped raw with hunger given her inability to choke them down. It didn’t seem to matter that they’d tested the meals beforehand. There was something different about eating them now, when all she wanted was a cheeseburger and some fries. At least she’d tolerated the quick lunch of beef jerky and dried fruit several hours ago.
Squish.
Squish.
Squish.
Yes, definitely not the most comfortable she’d ever been. And the emotions swirling through her shook her up and down almost like pregnancy hormones. What a ridiculous sight she had to be, getting angry over the smallest things and then elated moments later when nothing momentous had truly occurred.