It's My Life - Stacie Ramey Page 0,72

do it,” Mom says, but Rena comes with us anyway.

“No shower,” I say. “Just clothes.” My body is numb from the cold. My heart is broken. I am broken. And I still have no idea how Julian is.

“Okay, sweetie. Let’s get you into warm clothes.”

I feel like a rag doll as Rena unzips me as Mom puts a sweatshirt over my head. Rena pulls thermal underwear on me over my cast. Together they help me to the bathroom and then to bed.

I put my hand out. “My phone.”

“What could be so important?” Mom asks.

Rena sighs. “It’s smashed,” she reminds me and hands me my iPad. “You can use this in the meantime.”

I curl up into as tight a ball as I can. Mom stays and rubs my back and arms until I’m not cold anymore. I fall into a deep cavern of sleep.

* * *

When I wake up, I find that Rena crawled in bed with me like when we were little, and she’s crying.

I try to get my mouth to move to ask what’s wrong, but I’m so tired and freezing and fiery hot at the same time.

Rena rolls over. “Jenna? Are you awake?”

I nod.

“It’s all my fault. It’s all my fault.”

“What?” I manage.

“Julian. He’s been arrested. And it’s all because of me. Because you had to come after me.”

My mind is a swirling mess of pain. My lips are dry. So dry. My throat, too. And I’m on fire.

Rena must notice I’m not reacting to her confession or her angst, and she puts her hand on my forehead. “Oh my God, Jenna. You’re burning up.”

I want to ask her more about Julian. I want to tell her it isn’t her fault. It doesn’t matter what I want or what I think, because Rena’s running out my bedroom, and I hear her frantic steps to go find Mom or Dad.

It’s snowing outside. I feel the flakes land on me as they load me into the ambulance. Nothing seems real. Deep down I know this is probably just a cold or bronchitis, or even a slight bout of pneumonia. I’ve had that numerous times. But right now I am so tired and so cold and so numb to everything that it feels like this is the end.

The doors shut.

“Jenna, we are going to give you some fluids by IV,” an EMT says. “You still with me?”

I nod.

“Nothing to worry about. A walk in the park.”

I wonder if he realizes that a walk in the park would be difficult for me. I wonder if he knows how much he takes for granted. The ride goes by pretty quick. I remember that when we bought our house, Dad said a good hospital was close by. They didn’t know I heard him say that, but I did. Who chooses a house by its proximity to a hospital? My parents did. Do. Because of me.

At the hospital, the doors swing open. My teeth are chattering even though I’m under a thermal blanket. I am moved down the hallway, into a triage unit, where I’m transferred to a bed.

Gary appears, and I’m grateful for the familiar face. “Here we go, darling. Here we go.” He wheels me into my room. “Seems like you’ve won yourself a stay at our fine establishment.” My eyes close. “Pneumonia. Bilateral. I appreciate your dedication.”

He sets up my IVs, types a bunch of stuff into the computer, dispenses pills, and fills needles with magic medicine to put in my IV. Mom sits by my bed, a tissue crumpled in her hand. Gary puts his hand on her shoulder. “She’s going to be just fine, Sharon. We got this.”

Mom sniffles and nods. Her hand goes over his.

“We gotta take care of our girl,” Gary says. “Let me just run and get some of those juices she likes.”

The door shuts, and Mom starts in on me. “I just don’t know what to say to you, Jenna. I know you all think you’re immortal, like nothing can harm you. But I promise you, that’s not true.”

For a great moment, I forget all that’s happened, all the misery, and I think of Rena and Eric. If they were here, they’d interrupt her and try to save me. I feel myself smile, and Mom scoffs.

“And Rena? She’s worse than you are. Let me say this, in case you didn’t get the memo: You two are grounded. For. Life.”

I want to argue with her. I want to ask her if she was ever a teenager. If