Isn't It Bromantic (Bromance Book Club #4) - Lyssa Kay Adams Page 0,31
“Damn, man. You could bounce a quarter off that ass.”
Vlad looked over his shoulder. “Why would you throw a quarter at my ass?”
“It’s a phrase, nut sack,” Colton said. “Means you have a nice ass.”
“Of course I do. I am a hockey player. I have hockey butt.” He crouched with their help so he could sit in the water.
“What’s hockey butt?” Gavin asked.
“From skating,” Vlad grunted, easing farther into the water. “We get big thighs and butts compared to the rest of our bodies. Makes it very hard to buy pants.”
Del nodded. “I’ve actually heard that before.”
“Whatever,” Colton said. “Can we talk about the body hair? You gotta do something about that.”
Vlad glowered at him. “What is wrong with my hair?”
“It’s not supposed to be everywhere.”
Vlad gestured at his body. “This is how I am made. I am big, and I have a lot of hair.”
Colton shrugged. “I’m just saying a wax treatment on your chest every now and then wouldn’t be a bad idea.”
Malcolm smacked his head. “Knock it off, Colton. Body-shaming is unacceptable.”
“I’m not body-shaming. I’m saying the dude has a hairy chest.”
“Yeah, that is body-shaming. A man can’t help how much hair he’s born with any more than a woman can control whether she has a thigh gap. All bodies are beautiful.”
Vlad squeezed his eyes shut and thanked God that Elena wasn’t around to overhear any of this.
“Okay, we got your magnificent ass in the tub,” Malcolm said. “Do your thing, Gavin.”
“I can wash my own hair,” Vlad grumbled.
Mack pointed at him. “Shut up and let us take care of you.”
Gavin crouched on his knees next to the tub. “Someone hand me the shampoo.”
Vlad heard the creak of the glass shower door, and then Del handed Gavin a blue bottle of men’s shampoo and conditioner combo.
“Dude, that cheap shit will dry out your hair,” Mack said as Gavin squeezed a large dollop onto Vlad’s head. “You should be using a regular conditioner at least once a week.”
“I don’t use a conditioner,” Gavin said, digging his fingers into Vlad’s hair like he was kneading dough. Vlad closed his eyes because it actually kind of felt good.
“And your hair is dry,” Mack pointed out to Gavin. “It would look better if you took care of it.”
“Not all of us are blessed with hair like you and Vlad,” Gavin said.
“And Noah,” Vlad added. “Noah has good hair.”
“Thanks, man,” Noah said. “Means a lot.”
“So does Malcolm. Very thick and soft.”
“I use expensive products,” Malcolm said. “Mack’s right, dude. You should be trading up from that store-bought stuff. You gotta buy from a salon. Hair like yours is a thing of beauty. You should protect it.”
“Tilt your head back so I can rinse,” Gavin ordered, reaching for the handheld showerhead attached to the faucet. Malcolm turned on the water for him, and a moment later, warm water washed over Vlad’s head.
“There,” Gavin said, standing. “We’ll turn around so you can wash yourself, and then we’ll help you out.”
Vlad grabbed the bar of soap and started to bathe as the guys looked away. Nearly all of them were professional athletes, too, and knew the rules. No staring during the washing part.
“I’m done,” Vlad said, breaking the silence. “Can you help me out?”
Noah reached in to drain the tub as Vlad used his good leg to scoot himself onto the edge of the tub again. Colton took one arm and Malcolm the other to help him stand. Gavin was waiting with a towel, which he wrapped around Vlad’s waist.
It started to fall, so Colton tugged it tighter and tied it. “There you go, little butt,” he said, patting an ass cheek.
Vlad glared over his shoulder.
Colton shrugged. “That’s what my grandma used to say when she gave me baths as a kid. She’d dry me off and say, There you go, little butt.”
Del shook his head. “We have spent a lot of time discussing the Russian’s ass tonight.”
“It’s worth talking about,” Yan said.
Malcolm gestured toward the bedroom with his chin. “Let’s get him back to bed.”
They hobbled out of the bathroom, Malcolm and Colton on either side of him, while the others trailed behind. After getting him settled back into bed, the wet towel still wrapped around his waist and his leg elevated on a pillow, Vlad braced himself.
“There,” Colton said. “You don’t stink anymore. Now you get to tell us why the hell your wife has never seen you naked.”
Vlad paused. Took a breath. Looked away as he searched for words they would understand.