can manhandle me. I drop the caddy, uncaring that all my stuff spills out, and use my fingers to pry his hand from my wrist. “Let me go, you big asshole.” It’s useless; I can’t budge his hand from mine. I stop struggling and look up to meet his eyes. In that moment I want nothing more than to have control. “Let me go.” The command is soft, barely a whisper, but Ares immediately drops my hand. I look down to see welts forming around the bones of my wrist. I wrap my fingers around the redness and gently twist over the area.
Ares steps back. His eyes on my hands and he peers down at his own as if he doesn’t recognize it. “Cara, I’m sorry.” He shakes his head slowly. “I shouldn’t have…”
“You’re damn right you shouldn’t have.” I’m in disbelief. I can’t believe I trusted this guy enough last night to sleep next to him. All because I was worried about his comfort. I’m an idiot.
I shove past him. Ares falters back a step or two like he’s off balance. I’m in a full out sprint when I get to my RV. I pull the handle and let my head slam forward on the flimsy door. For the second time I’m locked out. My keys are probably on the ground with all my other stuff back at the bathhouse.
I tilt my face to the sky, anger, fear, and frustration warring inside me. My thoughts are racing, I feel trapped. I want to run from Canton. Pretend I never stepped foot in this shit town. But I can’t, I can’t leave without knowing what happened to my mom.
“Laura.” There’s a hesitancy in Ares’s voice when he calls my name. I turn around letting my back hit the door before sliding down to land on the step. He’s standing off to the side, keeping several feet of distance between us. I don’t look at him, instead I let my eyes gaze focus out in the distance. In my peripheral vision I see Ares scrub his hands over his face a few times.
“No one is supposed to come here.” My voice wavers. I don’t know how much more I can take, I’m close to losing the thread of sanity I have left. I want my mom, I want her to tell me everything is going to be all right. I snort out loud. Who am I kidding, that’s never been my mom. I’ve always been the one that had to keep her from falling apart. I want to let it all go for just a little while, I thought that’s what I was doing yesterday, but it’s all still there. My mom is still gone, I’m a few hundred dollars away from being homeless, and I have four guys trying to convince me I’m somehow destined to be part of their group. Yet, they can’t manage to be nice to me for more than five seconds. Oh yeah, sign me up for a lifetime of servitude to a bunch of assholes who want me to stay hidden like some Quasifuckingmodo.
“Oliver told me we weren’t allowed to disturb your mom.” Ares examines his hands flipping them back and forth a few times. “Cara, I’m so sorry I grabbed you.”
“Laura, my name is Laura. Not Cara.”
Ares nods his head vigorously and continues, “I… that… I’m not sure…” He struggles to find words finally settling on, “That will never happen again.”
“You know you guys are ridiculous, right?” I tilt my head, looking in his direction. Ares straightens his spine. “You think I’m desperate enough to cling to a bunch of guys that are barely able to tolerate me?” My tone is flat, unaffected. I don’t mention the way they acted like I didn’t even exist in front of that girl who was looking for him. I can’t imagine what would have happened if she had found me in his bed instead of Dante, him calling me a slut was bad enough.
I spread my arms wide, encompassing my surroundings. “You think I’ll let you treat me like dirt, because I don’t know any better. I’m just trailer trash, right?” My voice rising as I come to my feet.
“Ca…Laura,” Ares corrects, “you don’t understand.” When I open my mouth to argue he lifts his hand, his eyes pleading with me to let him finish. “We lost hope that you even existed. I know you doubt what we’re telling you is real, but it is. It’s so