Inappropriate - Vi Keeland Page 0,38

Big Bear Lake closer to LA because of all my appointments, my being sick…”

Of course it was a lot, and she was right. Lily took Mom’s ovarian cancer diagnosis just as badly as I did. I had no doubt Lily should talk to someone on a regular basis. But she’d been looking forward to her eighteenth birthday mainly because the state couldn’t force her to go see a shrink once a month anymore. To her, seeing a therapist of any kind meant she was crazy like her mother.

“I don’t know, Mom. She’s not going to want to go.”

“If anyone can talk her into it, you can. You two are closer than brother and sister.”

I frowned. I felt bad that we were still lying to my mom, and to everyone. But if my parents had known we were a couple when we were fifteen, they might not have taken Lily back. The state definitely wouldn’t have allowed it. Then as we got older, we didn’t say anything because it was easier to have our privacy. If Mom knew we were together, we’d never be allowed behind a closed door again—especially not with my little sisters around.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

Lily swept into the kitchen and sing-songed, “Good morning.”

She was full of energy, even though she’d been up all night painting. It seemed like she had two moods lately: up or down. There was no real in-between anymore. But I could understand it; she’d been through a lot.

“Happy birthday.” Mom stood and brought Lily in for a hug. She cupped her cheeks, along with some hair. “Eighteen. Today brings you a lot of freedom. You’ve spent time with us over the years because you had to, but I hope you’ll stay for many more now because you want to. You’re part of this family, Lily.”

“Thank you, Pia.”

Mom sniffled and shook her head. “I don’t want to ruin your birthday and get all emotional. So let me just give you your gifts.” She turned around, took two wrapped boxes off the kitchen counter, and handed them to Lily. “Happy birthday, sweetheart.”

Lily thanked her and opened the first one. Her eyes lit up as she found a big set of expensive oil paints she always visited in the store. “Thank you so much. I’ve wanted these for so long. But they’re so expensive. You shouldn’t have.”

“Grant told me how much you admired them.”

She opened the second box—stationery with Lily imprinted on it and lilies wrapped around her name.

She ran her finger across the top. “This is beautiful.”

“I figured you could use it to write to Grant when he goes away to college.”

Lily’s eyes jumped to me, but then she smiled at Mom. “Thank you. It’s perfect. I really love it.”

Four years ago, when Lily moved back in with her mom the first time, she’d told me she would write to me every day we couldn’t be together. I’d thought she was exaggerating, but the last time I counted, I had over five hundred letters. Some days she sent me three or four pages about her day, other days she’d just write a few sentences, and sometimes I’d get a poem or a picture she’d drawn. But she never missed a day. So the stationery was a great idea, though she wouldn’t be using it when I went away to college. I’d decided to stay home. Yet another thing neither Lily nor I had mentioned to my mom yet.

I looked at my watch. “You ready to get going?”

“I am.”

“You two be careful,” Mom said. She turned to Lily. “Enjoy your visit with your mom.”

If today was anything like most days with Rose, there was about a fifty-fifty shot of that happening.

***

A psychiatric center might be a hospital, but it’s a hell of a lot different than the place you go when someone has a baby or something, or at least this one was. The white walls were bare, with no cheerful art or framed pictures to soften the hardness of the environment. Since the floor we were visiting at Crescent Psychiatric Hospital was an adult-only wing, everyone was dressed casually, mostly in street clothes. But a few people were milling around in pajamas, even though it was the middle of the day.

Rose, Lily’s mother, wasn’t in the activity center or any of the common areas. We found her in her room, lying in bed in the fetal position with her eyes open. Her big belly was really showing now. Three months ago when she

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