How Much I Feel - Marie Force Page 0,64
out of bed and run for the bathroom to brush my hair and teeth. I’m wearing a robe over a long T-shirt, and I consider changing into something sexier.
Stop. Just stop. Breathe. Relax.
Easier said than done. When he gets here, I have no doubt we’ll pick up where we left off in the car this morning—and we probably won’t stop with kisses. I’m ready for more. I want more.
I just hope I can go through with it. I’m reassured by the certainty that Jason will follow my lead, that he won’t push me for more than I can handle. I’m ready for this because it’s him. Because I trust him. And because I want him. At the end of the day, it’s really that simple.
By the time he knocks on my door, my heart rate is approaching the danger zone, and I’m lightheaded from failing to breathe. Good thing he’s an accomplished doctor, because I might need one.
When I open the door, he fills the doorway. Once again, his arms are over his head on the doorjamb, dress shirt sleeves rolled up to reveal muscular arms. The look of blatant desire in his tired eyes makes my knees weak. For the longest time, we simply stare at each other.
“You going to invite me in, sweetheart?”
His question startles me out of the trance I slipped into at the sight of him. “Oh, um, yes. Of course. Come in.”
The door clicks shut, and I turn to him. “How’d it go—”
He wraps his arm around my waist, pulls me tight against him and kisses me.
Hours of anticipation and desire come together in the most passionate kiss we’ve shared yet. We’re ravenous for each other, his lips and tongue devouring me with a ferocity that has me clinging to him in order to remain standing. He presses my back to the wall in the foyer, tips his head and cups my cheek, his fingers sliding gently over my sensitive skin as his lips and tongue continue their sensual torture.
It’s unbearable and necessary at the same time. Until he caressed me with such tenderness, I hadn’t realized how much I’ve missed being touched like this.
“Tell me to stop, Carmen,” he whispers gruffly in my ear, setting off a whole new calamity inside me.
With Tony, our physical relationship was a slow build as we went from children to adults and learned about love and desire together. This . . . This is an entirely different experience. I can’t get close enough to Jason. I’m drunk on the way he makes me feel, alive in a way I haven’t been in years, in a way I thought I might never be again.
I can’t even find the wherewithal to feel guilty or conflicted about having these feelings for someone other than my late husband. The need for Jason is so consuming it drowns out everything else, even Tony. A week ago, I would’ve said that wasn’t possible. Now I know otherwise.
He shifts his attention to my neck, and I strain to get closer to him, our bodies intimately aligned, the hard ridge of his cock pressed to my belly.
Though he has my brain completely scrambled, I still want to know how the surgery went. “Tell me about the boy,” I manage to say as he kisses my neck. “Is he okay?”
“If you believe in things happening for a reason, I’ve got quite a story for you.”
I grab his shirt to keep him close to me while he tells me his story.
“The mother signed the release, right?”
“She did.”
“Then I can tell you the boy had a tumor.”
Gasping, I look up at him. “Oh my God.”
He continues to kiss my neck and make me crazy. “He had a medulloblastoma, a tumor on the posterior fossa, the most common malignant brain tumor of childhood. It occurs exclusively in the cerebellum. It was a T2, which means it was greater than three centimeters in diameter, with no evidence of gross subarachnoid or hematogenous metastasis, which is the best news of all.”
I shiver, as much from what he’s doing to my neck as listening to him and realizing just how incredibly smart and talented he is. That’s as attractive to me as his handsome face, warm smile and sexy body. “I have no idea what you just said, but it sounds serious.”
“It’s the exact tumor my team and I have been studying for the last three years.”
I pull back again to look up at his face. “Seriously?”
He nods. “There is, literally, no one