The Hollow Page 0,85

coming, and I know we'll all do whatever we can, whatever we have to do. But I don't know if I can survive if I lose you."

It was his sadness that lay on her heart now. The unbearable weight of his sorrow. "We'll find a way. You've always believed that. You've made me believe it. Come on. You're going upstairs to lie down. No arguments."

She cajoled, bullied, and nagged him upstairs. By the time she got him into bed, he was too exhausted to argue, or make suggestive jokes when she undressed him and tucked him in. When she was sure he was asleep, she ran down to close the office, then back up again to call Cal and ask him to come.

Layla put her finger to her lips when he came in the back way. "He's sleeping. He had a rough night, and a rough day. A nightmare," she added, gesturing him into the kitchen. "One that blurred me and Carly together."

"Oh. Shit."

She poured coffee without asking if he wanted it. "He told me about her, not without considerable struggle, and considerable pain. He's worn out now."

"Better he told you though. Fox doesn't do well holding stuff in." He started to drink, lowered the mug and frowned. "How did coffee get in here?"

"He bought me a coffeemaker."

Cal let out a half laugh. "He'll be all right, Layla. It hits him sometimes. Not often, but when it does, it hits hard."

"He blames himself, and that's stupid," she said so briskly, Cal lifted his brows. "But he loved her so he can't do anything else. He told me as soon as he knew she'd left the farm, he tried to find her. You were burned getting people out of a house-kids out-some guy was shooting up the town, that son of a bitch Napper came at him with a baseball bat, and he's sick because he couldn't stop her from jumping."

"Here's what he probably didn't tell you, stop me if I'm wrong. He was burned, too, not as bad as I was, that time, but bad enough. When the call came through, he took off ahead of me and Gage. On the way he kicked Proctor- that was the guy with the shotgun-square in the nuts, tossed Gage the gun, and kept going. He punched out one of two boys tearing into a woman on the sidewalk. I got the other one, but it slowed me down. And there was Napper. He got a good swing in with that bat. Broke Fox's arm."

"My God."

"Gage went in like a battering ram, and Fox took off again. It took both of us to take Napper out. Fox was already running up the stairs when we got inside the old library. And it was hell in there. We were too late, too. She was jumping, hell, she was diving off that ledge when we ran out on the roof. I thought he was going to go over after her. He was bloody from fights, from being rammed by books that flew around like missiles, and God knew what else. There was nothing he could do. He knows it. But once in a while it takes ahold of him and gives him a good, hard squeeze."

"If she'd believed him, believed in him and done what he asked-what she promised him-she'd be alive."

Cal kept his calm gray eyes even with hers. "That's right. Exactly right."

"But he won't blame her."

"It's harder to blame the dead."

"Not for me, not at the moment. If she'd loved him enough, believed in him enough to keep her promise- only that, to keep her promise-he wouldn't have had to risk his life to try to save her. I didn't say that to him, and I'm going to try very hard not to. But I feel better now that I've said it out loud."

"I've said it out loud, and to his face. I felt better, too, but it didn't seem to do the same for him."

Layla nodded. "There's something else. Why Carly? She wasn't part of the town, but she was infected, apparently, in minutes. So strongly that she committed suicide."

"It's happened before. It's mostly people who live in the Hollow, but outsiders can get caught up."

"I bet most of them get caught up as victims of someone who's infected. But here she is, the woman one of you loves, and she's caught up immediately. I wonder about that, Cal, and I wonder how it was he heard her calling, that she was