Hold Me Close - Talia Hibbert Page 0,289

teenager, fuck it, a grown woman—but she heard Marilyn’s voice telling her not to be petty and to stop bringing up the past. That voice was vicious and wrong. Rae still listened.

Zach swept his thumb over the inside of her wrist, commanding her attention again. “You don’t have to tell me everything all at once. Just know, if you ever feel like talking, I’ll always be here.”

She nodded. Her smile was as tremulous as the hope in her chest. “Right. Thank you.” Then, trying to lighten the mood, she said, “You have to tell me a secret, now. To make it even.”

He didn’t respond with the easy teasing she’d hoped for. Instead, he said quietly, “Sure. I’ll tell you a secret. I’ll tell you about my dad.” His fingertips followed the faint turquoise veins of her wrist, his eyes distant. “When I was a kid, he ran off with some woman. Just vanished. I still loved him, but I felt so guilty about it, because he’d fucked us over. All of a sudden, we were poor, Ma had to work all the time, and everyone treated her like dirt. I’d fantasise about him coming home, but somehow, I always knew he wouldn’t.” There was a pause before he added softly, “I missed him anyway.”

If Rae was a lifelong Ravenswood resident, she might’ve known the bare facts of this story already. But she’d had no idea—and even if she had, she wouldn’t have understood until she saw the look on Zach’s face right now. She nodded slowly, put her free hand on his shoulder, and squeezed.

He looked up in a flash of grateful blue. “We figured it out, in the end. My mother is a superhero. We didn’t need him. But then Nate fucked off.” Zach added that without bite, more exasperated than upset. “Not that I minded—he had his own life to live and his own issues to deal with—but it was… hard. You know he never came back until Mum got sick?”

No, Rae hadn’t. “Really?”

“Yeah. He had great timing, because all my friends disappeared on me at that point. Except Evan. He calls it the cancer effect. No-one wants to stick around.”

“Wow.” She bit her lip. “I’m starting to see a trend in your life. The universe throws awful shit your way and you just… deal with it.”

Zach huffed out a laugh. “Seriously? That’s the trend you see?”

“What do you see?”

He frowned, thoughtful for a moment. “I don’t know. I guess… everyone leaving me behind.”

Her heart fell. “Zach.”

“Hey, now. Don’t look so serious. Fuck ‘em, right?” She could tell he regretted saying something so heavy. In fact, it occurred to her that he was never heavy. Usually, everything was easy with Zach. Now she wondered just how hard he worked to avoid ever being difficult.

She caught his hand in both of hers, staring down at his pale, work-roughened palm, fighting the urge to kiss it. “You know, I… I really…” Love you. You are like no-one I’ve ever met, and I really fucking love you.

The weight of the realisation cracked her ribcage open. She couldn’t deny it now—no matter how much she wanted to. Her heart was painfully, wonderfully vulnerable, officially free to fly off and hurt itself again. But maybe, if she didn’t react, the poor thing wouldn’t notice that it belonged to him. Maybe it would stay safe and sound and oblivious. That would probably be for the best, because she loved him so completely that it felt dangerous, so wildly that the feeling overflowed like a river after a storm. Her banks had broken. The flood would bring society to a halt and damage lots of people’s carpets. There would be newspaper headlines.

Zach squeezed her hand. “Rae?”

She realised that she’d practically frozen on the spot. Shit. “Sorry. Just… thought of something.”

He arched a brow. “You need to write it down?”

He thought she meant a story idea. “No,” she said. “I’ll remember it.” For the rest of my fucking life. “Listen, Zach. You should know…” She swallowed hard, her throat suddenly dry. For the first time in a long time, she was desperate to say something sweet to a man, something gentle and loving and open, even if the idea terrified her. Zach deserved to hear how truly wonderful he was. To know that someone adored him, and always would. Even if she couldn’t say the words outright.

“I see how you deeply care for people,” she began, already feeling ridiculous. “I know how huge your heart is.