tell my body it wasn’t dying. I had passed out a number of times before I stopped resisting. Once I accepted my condition, my heart finally slowed down. Without oxygen, it was pointless to breathe, but that pain and urge never went away. All I could do was just lie there, because if I started to think about breathing, I’d panic all over again.
Most of all, it grieved me that my father would have spent the rest of his life searching for me, and each time he visited my mother’s grave, he wouldn’t have had any idea that I was down there. After my coffee this morning, I’d borrowed Christian’s phone to call Crush. I was surprised to learn that he had gone searching for me last night, so I let him know that there was nothing to worry about and I was out celebrating. Telling him a lie was far easier than causing him unnecessary pain with the truth. I told him I loved him and decided never to leave our last conversation on an argument. Someday it would be the last, and what would be the last thing I’d want him to remember me saying to him?
“What are they doing down there?” Switch asked.
I gasped and shoved him back.
He held up his hands. “Whoa, it’s just me.”
I exhaled and shook my head. “Sorry. Reflexes.”
He stepped closer. “I haven’t seen you all day. You okay?”
“I had a lot of sleep to catch up on,” I said, turning on my heel to face the window again.
Gem let her kimono drop to the ground and looked at the pool apprehensively. When she stepped into the water, she froze as if she might leap out. Niko extended his arm, and she gripped his hand. I realized he was going to walk in with her, so it was a good thing he wasn’t wearing shoes. Just his usual late-night attire of baggy pants.
“I haven’t seen her swim in eons,” I remarked. “Someone drowned her in there, you know.”
“I remember. Sometimes you just gotta get back on the horse.” Switch joined my side and put his hands in his pockets.
His comment was meant for me. Even though he didn’t know the details of my job or what I’d gone through these past weeks, he must have sensed it the way Shifters often did. Maybe that intuition was why he was so good with kids.
He nudged me with his elbow. “Feel like playing a game of darts?”
“Not tonight. Maybe you should go out with your friends more often.”
He stepped up to the edge of the window. “I’m not looking for entertainment. I was just trying to make you feel better. You can’t talk about your job, but maybe I can help you forget it.”
I wanted to say thanks, but I had a feeling he already knew I appreciated his thoughtfulness. Switch wanted to look out for me, and I suppose that loyalty went back to my father and how the two of us grew up in the same cluster. Having him around really helped me forget. Switch loved telling stories and making me laugh, but this was something that a game of darts wasn’t going to rectify. I didn’t want to forget. I needed to remember.
There were so many people who could have buried me, but Houdini was my primary suspect. I’d staked a lot of Vampires in the past whom I presumed dead, and I’d made a lot of enemies since, but maybe Houdini had done it to protect his secrets. He liked fucking with people’s minds, and he was the last person I remembered seeing. What if Fletcher had done it? It was possible that I’d forgotten from the lack of oxygen and trauma.
In the darkest moment, when the silence in the coffin had been more than I could bear, I’d actually wondered if Christian had done it.
Gem waded deeper into the water with Niko beside her. They were waist deep, the blue-green lights illuminating Gem’s frightened expression as she turned around. An owl hooted outside as if he had something to say about it.
“I’ve got some good news,” Switch said, his voice merrier. “The trial period is over. Viktor made me an official offer to work for him. He said I’ve proven myself more than once, and Hunter is responding well to his education.”
“That sounds like Viktor. Congratulations.”
“I’ve never worked with just one child, but Hunter has a lot of issues. I had to consult a specialist to be sure I wasn’t