The Happy Ever After Playlist - Abby Jimenez Page 0,95
and less like what it had been so far.
But even as draining as the touring had been, there was good in it too. I’d fallen so much more in love with Jason over the last three months. I’d always been in awe of him—even before I knew who he was. But now I loved him for a hundred more reasons.
I’d learned he was kind and polite to everyone, from the people who checked us into our hotels to the cashiers at the gas stations. I learned he’d stay until every single person who wanted to meet him got the chance, no matter how tired he was. He was generous. He tipped well and took care of the people around him. He always helped bring in his gear, even though his crew was supposed to do it. I knew he carried around spare guitar picks to give to little kids who wanted autographs. And most of all, I knew he cherished me. I felt like the center of his gravity. Like wherever I was, he was orbiting me. It was an honor to be loved by him and it made all of this worth it, even though it was hard.
We were lying there with our heads on the same pillow, looking at each other. He reached out and brushed my hair behind my ear as I studied him. I’d memorized every freckle in his eyes. Every line. “I could paint your face from memory, you know that?” I said quietly. “You are burned into me, Jason.”
He smiled gently. “Sloan, I did something for you.”
I bit my lip. “What?”
He let out a breath. “You can say no if you want to, but I put a lot of thought into it and really think you should do it.”
“I put a lot of thought into something too,” I said. “I think we should try sleeping on the bus again. You’re right, it’s more practical. I’m just going to have to get used to—”
“I want you to go to Ely and stay a few months with my family.”
I bolted up straight. “What?!”
He sat up and put out a hand. “Hear me out, okay? It’s not as crazy as it sounds. I want you to do that commission,” he said. “And I think my parents’ house would be the perfect place to do it. You could paint by the bay window overlooking the lake. You could take Tucker with you and he’d have all that space to run after being cooped up with us for so many months. My mom’s freezer is full of wild game and you could cook and maybe start updating your blog again. Mom loves you and she wants to get to know you better. Minnesota is central, so no matter where I am in the US, you could fly out to see me and be there within three hours and the time differences won’t be that bad. And I called Kristen. Her and Oliver are going to come and stay with you there for two weeks.”
I blinked at him. “You…you called Kristen?”
His blue eyes held mine. “Yes, I did. You could go to California for Thanksgiving and see your parents. And if you leave now, you’ll be done with the painting in time to join me in Paris for Christmas. The timing is perfect.”
I was speechless.
“Jason, I don’t want to leave you…”
He shook his head. “Look, we have to figure out how to make this work for both of us. It’s not going to end anytime soon. You need to have something that’s for you.” He looked me in the eye. “I want you to go. I want you to do this.”
We stared at each other, my chest rising and falling a little too quickly and him looking levelly back at me. It was so thoughtful and sweet. Really, it was. But I couldn’t…could I?
After losing Brandon, I’d found joy in nothing. Everything stopped for me. My world was a bleeding watercolor in the rain. And now it was a stark white canvas, begging for me to paint on it—and my hands were tied behind my back.
I was in an in-between again. I’d set up a new shrine without even realizing I was doing it, only this one wasn’t for Brandon or Jason. It was for Jaxon.
I wanted to do that commission so badly it was a physical craving. I had to go somewhere else to paint it. That was the simple truth of it. There was no other choice.