Hannah's Hero - Ruby Dixon Page 0,16
get some sleep.
HANNAH
I’m an asshole.
I sit in the tent for a moment longer, still shocked that J’shel chastised me. J’shel, who everyone praises as kind and nice and thoughtful. J’shel, who always looks at me with eager welcome. J’shel, who carries N’dek around selflessly all day long and makes sure he’s taken care of.
J’shel just told me I was being a baby.
And…I hate that he’s right. I’ve been crying and moping because fate’s taken my exciting career away from me. I was going to have a book that was going to be placed in so many stores and had so much advertising and early press that it was sure to be a runaway hit. A movie’s going to be made. I was supposed to get millions of dollars and my career would be launched into the stratosphere.
Now all that’s going to happen without me there. And so I’ve been whining and moping because I don’t get to be famous and rich.
But J’shel lost his family. And we’ve both lost our world and we’re stuck here.
So yeah, I’m a huge jerk. I let this soak in for a moment longer, and then I wipe my tears off my cheeks, straighten my furs around my shoulders, and head out to give him an apology.
When I approach the main fire, though, J’shel isn’t there. N’dek is, but he barely glances at me and resumes poking at the coals.
“Um, hi,” I say, feeling awkward. “Have you seen—”
Before I can answer, he points his stick at the beach. “He walks there. Alone.”
“Right. Thanks.” I’m not sure if that’s a subtle poke at me, but if it is, I deserve it. Head held high, I trudge into the dark, heading toward the beach and the waves that crash endlessly on shore.
Being here alone in the middle of the night is a little intimidating. There are no lights other than the distant campfire and the stars above, and the sea looks ominous as it crashes and surges back and forth. I think of Devi and her massive dinosaur footprints, and of the tentacled things I’ve seen rising out of the waters, and hope nothing feels like venturing out to shore anytime soon. I don’t see J’shel, though, and worry he must have walked farther away than I realize. I head down the beach, toward the rocks, peering around for a broad set of shoulders. Something slaps against my boot and I jump, kicking away another one of the dead scorpion things. God, they really are everywhere. I hope all this dead stuff doesn’t attract predators to the beach. Worried, I pause and glance out at the waters—
And yelp aloud as a hand touches my arm.
Another one of J’shel’s hands immediately covers my mouth, and then his big, warm body presses up against me. He’s so tall and broad that it feels as if I’m being enveloped by him, and I imagine this is what it must feel like to be hugged by a bear.
“Shhh, H’nah,” he murmurs, his hand moving away from my mouth. “Others are sleeping.”
“Right,” I whisper, looking up at him. “I didn’t see you.”
“I shifted my camouflage for safety,” he murmurs. “Which is why you should not be out here in the dark alone.”
I want to say that I’m not alone, that he’s with me, but he’s still holding me close against his body. He’s got a hand at my hip and my cootie’s roaring nearly as loud as the ocean. All of this feels a little too intimate, but I can’t bring myself to pull away. “I needed to apologize.”
“For what?”
“For being selfish. For acting like I’m the only one that’s lost something. I know you have, too. Everyone has. I just…I lost something big. Something I’d been so excited about, and to have it snatched away overnight feels like a cruel joke. I’m still adjusting.”
“We all are,” he says simply, and his hand tightens on my hip. “There is much for all of us to adjust to.”
I shiver, but I’m not sure if I’m cold or if it’s the low, tender tone of his voice. There’s a liquid heat pooling in my belly, and I know it’s because of my cootie, but it’s hard for me to move away, not when everything I am is screaming for me to stay right here, right in his arms. “It doesn’t mean I wasn’t an ass,” I murmur. “I’m sorry. I mean it. I’ll try to do better. I’m tired of crying anyhow.”
J’shel steps back,