“Yeah.” He didn’t need to know the whole story. I opened one of the cans of cannellini beans, the word here bouncing around in my head some more. “I really liked the kitchen,” I explained, like that would mean something to him. For a split second, I wondered if CJ had mentioned my WatchTube channel to him, but it wasn’t like it mattered. I wasn’t going to bring it up.
Unless he asked, I guessed.
“It sure is a nice kitchen.”
“For what I’m paying, it should be.” Peeking over my shoulder, I didn’t have to force myself to smile at my old friend who was sitting there with his elbows on the counter and his chin resting on one palm, those light blue eyes on me, striking against his handsome and—now that I really got a good look at it—tired face.
Had he not been sleeping? Or was he just tired and stressed? I hadn’t heard a word about what was going on with his career since that first day.
One corner of that cute mouth went up, reminding me again of the boy I had known and loved who had always been nothing but kind and good to me… until he’d basically disappeared. “No roommate?”
“No,” I explained as I dumped the beans into a strainer and moved toward the sink to rinse them. “This is the first time I’ve lived by myself, but I like it.” I cleared my throat, wanting to change the subject. “Your roommate, CJ, seemed nice.”
“Yeah, he’s a good guy.” It was Zac’s turn to blow out a breath that he didn’t even try and muffle even though I had my back to him. “I’m so damn sorry I left you hanging, Peewee,” my old friend said unexpectedly, direct and to the point, in a clear voice that managed to sound genuinely apologetic.
I could do this.
“It’s okay,” I started to say, turning back around to him. He was shaking his head. The lines at his eyes creased deeply as he frowned.
“No, it ain’t. It was a real dick thing, darlin’, and I’m sorry as hell. Mama would’ve tanned my hide for doin’ that to anybody, but especially to you. I was on the phone with my agent. I got in trouble for ignorin’ his calls there for a while, when I was in Liberty Hill, and he got all bent out of shape. It’s no excuse, but I’m sorry I couldn’t get off the phone with him sooner,” Zac said in a rush of words, like he had to get it out. “I already had Trevor breathin’ down my neck, and I couldn’t put my agent off much longer anymore.”
He’d gotten in trouble? Because his agent was trying to get him on a new team or something and he hadn’t been answering his calls? Or what?
He kept on going, showing more and more pieces of the boy-man who had earned my loyalty and love so long ago. “Will you forgive your old Snack Pack?” he asked in that Zac way that was all sugar and earnestness and that smile that could slay a dragon as he glanced up at me from beneath his eyelashes.
My old Snack Pack.
Ah, shit.
He wasn’t done either. “Next time, you can listen to me gettin’ reamed, if you want. My agent’s a pro, and Trev’s real good at it too. He could teach some classes on rippin’ folks new ones when they’re already down.”
I blinked again.
I’d never been the type of person who held crazy grudges. Even Connie let go of things pretty quick. It was probably our parents’ fault, honestly. Their soft hearts were the reason why they were good doctors. Our grandma, on the other hand, had remembered everything and didn’t let you forget it.
But everything about that long body here at my apartment, because he was so tall and all of his muscles were as endless and ripped as his bones were, seemed apologetic and honest. Sincere. Those eyes of his were kind and real.
I never listened to what those TV anchors said about him, about how he was immature and unreliable, about how he’d never reached his max potential.
The thing was, my cousin wouldn’t still be best friends with an asshole.
And Zac wouldn’t be here if he hadn’t given a shit about leaving me hanging.
All that said something to me.
This was my choice—to forgive or not. I hadn’t lived my life waiting around