was his mistake to make. He’d let me make a handful of my own. It was just another reason why I couldn’t say anything to him about getting married.
Been there, done that, fucked it up, and regretted it.
Plus, more than anything, my cousin was a good man. One of the best. And I knew his heart. If he said he’d forgiven what’s-her-face, he really had. Down to his bones.
So, it was either isolating my cousin or rolling with it. If things didn’t work out… well, I was going to be there for that too. Through thick and thin. Like he’d always been with me. The little cousin he’d always treated better than a sister.
Just as I opened my mouth to tell Boogie I was in, Zac leaned forward across the table.
“Look, if you wanna marry Lauren, then I’ll be right there next to you.” The long man stretched his spine as he lifted an elbow and settled it on the back of the booth, spreading out across it. My God, when the hell had he grown those muscles on his chest? I didn’t remember seeing them so clearly before, even in the pictures he posted on Picturegram of himself at some beach around the world. I forced myself to focus on his Disney prince face though as he kept going. “You already know why I feel the way I feel, but you know I want the best for you.” Those blue eyes then slid toward me, and the tiny lines at the corners of them crinkled as he took in my face, slow and lingering on me in a way that made me wonder why he was taking so long looking at me. “We want the best for you because you are the best. Same as you’d want for us, right, Peewee?”
I felt my nostrils flare as I glanced back and forth between the two longtime best friends. Two nearly complete opposites in every physical way. Tall and not as tall. The athlete and the… whatever it was he did. He’d explained it to me a dozen times, and I still didn’t get it. Managing wealth, whatever the hell that meant.
Two people who loved and valued each other very much.
Who wanted the best for themselves and always had.
In a way, it was like me and Connie. We made no sense on paper but made total sense in person.
Because people who loved you really did want the best for you, and that was why I had supported Zac throughout the years even though he’d hurt me and had no idea I’d been rooting for him all along. So.
“Right,” I agreed, nudging my cousin again. “We love your dumb face, Boog. As long as you’re happy, that’s what matters.” God, that had been hard to get out. I really didn’t like Lauren, but I wasn’t the one marrying her, and fortunately, she had never made it seem like she hated how close Boogie and I were, so I’d give her that.
Boogie, though, exhaled in relief. He was all dark, short hair and a forever baby face with his grown-up clothes of a button-up shirt only missing the tie he wore for work. And my cousin said, in a voice that I could hear was tight, “Yeah, that’s what I want. You know it.”
Of course it was. Nobody wanted to get married and have loved ones upset over it. He deserved to have us cheering, but considering the circumstances… this was better than nothing? I was sorry that I wasn’t sorry I still wanted better for him.
Zac and Boogie both nodded at each other, and I just sat there and watched.
When my cousin’s dark eyes moved toward me, I gave him a smile I knew was faker than I would have wanted, but I hoped it was genuine enough. If Zac could do it, so could I. Even if he couldn’t, I would, because I could do anything for Boogie. And being in his wedding was the least of it. I’d survived three months working for Gunner. I’d made it five years in a relationship with someone I didn’t actually know. I’d read mean comments about myself. I had goals and a few dreams. I could handle anything.
Including but not limited to this. So I poked him. “I’m too old to be the flower girl, by the way,” I told him. “So I’m a little disappointed you’ve made me wait this long.”
That got my cousin shaking his head, a big grin settling over