Grip Trilogy Box Set - Kennedy Ryan Page 0,149

or to wake with the possessive weight of his arm around me, welcome and beloved. I never expected any of what has transpired over the last two days.

And I almost gave him away.

I would have forfeited the perfect weight of his body over mine. Would never have felt the sweet heat of him wrapped around me, or the bold sweep of his hands over my nakedness under our covers in the morning. These are the things that cost nothing but are precious. And I almost never had them.

“What are you thinking about?”

Grip’s whispered question mists the sensitive skin of my neck, and I scoot back to snuggle under the covers and against his hard, naked body.

“‘Night on the Island.’”

“Fitting.” He opens his mouth over the curve of my shoulder in a kiss. “Because you were definitely wild and sweet last night.’”

“You weren’t so bad yourself.” I turn over to run my thumb over his full lips. “Neruda was so romantic. I’m glad you introduced me to him.”

“Dude had serious game.” Grip laughs. “No one writes about love and sex and passion like Neruda.”

He grins down at me, a hint of mischief in his eyes. “The original Chocolate Charm.”

We both laugh at that. I haven’t heard it in so long. It’s our own inside joke, from the first day we met, but Grip really could charm lint from your pockets.

“I believe you promised to make me come with words alone.” My husky laugh puckers the smooth quiet of the room. “Will you be using his words or your own? Or was that an empty threat?”

“You’ll just have to wait and see,” he teases me.

He pauses before going on with a more solemn tone.

“When I saw the book and the whistle on your bed, I didn’t know what to think. Even though I knew the connection between us was undeniable, the last few weeks had me questioning everything I believed was possible for us.”

“I’m sorry.” I swallow my uncertainty and force myself to tell him things I’ve kept for years. “When it first came in the mail, I wanted to burn that book. I was furious with you over Tessa. I didn’t want it to mean anything to me.”

Despite his hand caressing my hip, I sense a stillness in him behind me, an alertness that tells me he’s listening with every part of him.

“But even after I told myself I would put that week behind me, put you behind me,” I continue. “I found myself reading it at night.”

“Yeah?” He pushes my hair aside and traces the downy line of my nape with a finger. “Why?”

I shrug, reaching for the ease we shared yesterday at my house. In my shower. In my bed. Sex has always been much easier than intimacy, but with Grip they’re inextricable. One giving rise to the other. One and the same. Sex with other men never meant much to me, but taking Grip inside my body shook me, rearranged me. Sharing the thoughts I’ve kept private for so long, I feel just as naked as I did in the shower when he commanded me to open myself for him. I feel more exposed.

“I kept going back to the book, reading your notes in the margins and searching between the lines for what it could tell me about you,” I say. “When I moved to LA after college, the memories and emotions from that week all came back, and I had to freeze you out or I knew I’d give in to the pressure you put on me.”

“You acted like we’d never been anything to each other,” he says softly. “And despite my part in screwing things up, it pissed me off.”

“Oh, so was that hate fucking you did with all those other women?”

I turn onto my back to look into his eyes, the lighthearted note in my voice forced. There’s more than a granule of truth in most jokes, and this one is no exception. It’s levity with talons, and I take the chance to dig in, even if it isn’t entirely fair.

There’s regret, but no apology in his eyes. “Nope. Just plain old fucking fucking.”

He props up on one elbow and splays his hand possessively over my stomach.

“At first, I told myself I would win you back. I would remind you of how it had been between us, but you wouldn’t budge. After a year or so, I promised myself I wouldn’t give up on you, but I also assumed we’d circle back to each other