Grace and Glory (The Harbinger #3) - Jennifer L. Armentrout Page 0,89

reads,” I told him. “Unless an angel is going to pop up and answer the question, he was the best idea I could come up with.”

“I can’t even imagine what that conversation with Dez went like.”

“Oh, trust me, you don’t want to. I would like to pretend it never happened, but hopefully he finds something out so we...”

Those ultrabright eyes met mine. “So we know.”

Stomach flip-flopping all over the place, I nodded and then I started to speak but stopped.

Always observant, he caught it. “What? What were you about to say?”

Warmth crept into my cheeks as I untangled my tongue. “What would we do if I... God,” I groaned. “I can barely say it, which I know is stupid. But saying it makes it a more real possibility, and that reality is superscary now or ten years from now.”

“Agreed.” He nodded.

“But we’re adults, right? Basically. You more so than me, but it’s not like we’re not old enough—” I stopped myself with a shaky laugh. “Who am I kidding? If I was thirty, I wouldn’t feel old enough. What are we going to do if what you’ve got going on works with what I’ve got going on?”

One of his brows rose. “You mean, what if I got you pregnant?”

“What if we got ourselves pregnant,” I corrected.

“I don’t know,” he said with a soft, somewhat uncertain laugh. “We would—”

“Have to figure it out?”

“Together. Yes.”

“I can’t... I can’t even think about it,” I admitted. “That’s possibly the most immature response, which is a key sign that I’ll make a terrible parent, but I can’t even wrap my head around that possibility.”

“I can’t, either. And it’s not that I wouldn’t be okay with the idea—if that’s what you decided,” he said, and the next breath I took lodged somewhere in the swelling in my chest. “It’s just not something I’ve prepared myself for, but I will get prepared no matter what happens or is decided.”

Some of the unacknowledged tension loosened. It wasn’t that the possibility of being pregnant didn’t still freak me the Hell out. It did and then some, but it wouldn’t be something I faced alone. There was nothing I would face alone now.

“So, we’ve covered my dad, what it was like to get pumped full of grace, Lucifer, my crap vision, the fact I will grow old and you won’t, your dismay over what happened between us in the pool and the possibility of me being pregnant.” I grinned. “What a reunion, huh?”

Zayne laughed. “It’s perfect.”

“Whatever.”

“It is.” Dipping his head, he kissed me. “I need a shower. Want to join me?”

My heart skipped a beat and muscles low in my stomach tightened even as tiny beads of uncertainty pilled up in my stomach. I’d never showered with someone before. Obviously. Zayne was the first guy I’d ever been completely naked with, so my mind immediately showed me, in detail, all the ways I’d end up looking and behaving like a total goober, but my heart and my body was screaming, Shower? With Zayne? Yes and yes, please.

Those tiny beads in my stomach started bouncing with nervous energy, but now more than ever, I couldn’t let fear and self-consciousness drive my decisions. Not after learning the hard way that tomorrow wasn’t promised.

“Okay,” I said, hoping my voice didn’t sound as squeaky to him as it did to me. “I mean, yes. Sure.” Heat crept into my cheeks. “I’d like that.”

“You sure?” A softness had settled into his features. “We don’t have—”

“I’m sure,” I interrupted. “Hundred percent sure.”

“Good.” Zayne smiled then, and a whooshing motion swept through my chest. “Because I really don’t want to let you out of my sight for more than a few minutes. That probably sounds needy as Hell, but I just...” Lashes swept down, hiding his eyes. “I don’t know. I’m not expecting anything beyond you being there with me. I just need to be able to see you.”

“I get it.” And Lord, did I ever completely understand. “I feel the same way.”

He dipped his head, kissing me. “Why don’t you go ahead and get the shower started? I’m going to de-Cayman-ize the kitchen first.”

Since part of that mess was mine, I started to tell him he didn’t have to do that, but then it struck me. He was giving me time, making this less awkward, and yeah, getting undressed and stepping into the shower with him probably would have me giggling like there was something wrong with me.

Whatever it was that made Zayne so incredibly thoughtful