a terrible, selfish person, and I had no right to find comfort in his arms. I couldn’t blame him for not accepting this apology either. I was starting to understand what he meant when he said it was more about the person giving the words than the words themselves.
Huck barked, “Follow me.” And it was just like old times; that was exactly what I did. Followed him anywhere and everywhere and trusted that he would take care of me no matter what when I was too scared to think straight.
I found myself holding my breath as he pushed open the door to his room, tugging me along behind him when I faltered at the doorway. The room was pretty sparse in terms of decoration, but very much suited a single twenty-something guy. There were lots of dark colors and electronics, as well as a big bed that looked like it hadn’t been made in a few days. It wasn’t anything fancy, but I knew the space had to be special to him because it was his and his alone. It wasn’t something he had to battle Sawyer for, or an area that he was sharing with a woman who hated him. It was a place he felt safe—until I showed up and threw all that serenity and security out the window.
I stood awkwardly next to the bed while Huck rummaged around in a dresser drawer. A moment later, a pair of faded black sweatpants came flying my way.
“Put those on.” He practically growled the words as I clumsily moved to follow his demand. “Why do you think there might be hidden cameras in my house? Did Sawyer record you?”
I shoved my hands into my hair and looked down at my naked feet. “I didn’t hear you come home tonight.” It was a statement meant to change the subject, but I should’ve known Huck was like a dog with a bone when he latched onto something. He’d always been tenacious and determined.
“I got home right around the time you came running down the stairs. I asked Vernon for a charger and was going to come see what had you spooked, but you moved too fast. Now tell me why you’re worried about cameras.”
It was time to admit the truth to myself… and to him. “I honestly don’t know that anything can stop Sawyer. Even if he isn’t a physical threat, there is nothing wrong with his mind. He’s perfectly capable of finding others to do his dirty work for him. And his mother will always be there ready to back him up. He has enough money to hire someone fearless to get what he wants, and that makes me very afraid. I didn’t think things all the way through when I decided to run to you. If he’s put a plan in place to force me to go back to him, he’ll hurt whoever stands in his way. He used to be afraid of you, but now, I don’t think he’s afraid of anything.” I didn’t answer his question about the cameras because the truth was humiliating, and I didn’t want to explain how I figured out I was being monitored.
I was covering my own ass by leaving that mansion the first opportunity I got, but now knowing his might be on the line swamped me with regret. He’d always put me first no matter how he suffered, and I did nothing but put him at risk.
“I have to get out of here.” I said the words without thinking, but in my gut, I knew it was time to go. If anything happened to Huck and his friends because of me, I would never be able to forgive myself. There was already so much to apologize for, I couldn’t keep stacking the deck. I couldn’t keep forcing my feelings and regrets on him. It wasn’t fair. I had to let him go. “You’ve wanted me gone, and I agree. It is probably past time for me to go.”
I expected him to cheer.
To gloat.
To taunt me with my misguided and failed attempt to wiggle my way back into his life. I was ready for his relief and a swift farewell.
What I got instead was the shock of being thrown on the bed, and the surprise of having his well-built body crawling up over mine until I was completely caged in by him. He put a hand on my throat without applying any actual pressure and used his thumb to stroke along the