Goddess of Pain - Katie May Page 0,39

I taught and…of course…killing people.

“Remember what?” she blurts, exasperated.

“We fought.” I whirl around to face her, my stomach a tumultuous mixture of dread and despair. Will she hate me?

Her confused expression clues me in that she really doesn’t remember our most recent argument.

And a twisted part of me wants to keep it that way. How easy would it be to take her in my arms and kiss her senseless? Love her the way I’m so desperate to do? But it’s not fair to her, and I’ll hate myself forever.

“In the Realm of the Gods,” I swallow down a lump the size of Texas, “you found me in a…compromising position.”

Confusion appears in her eyes before something shatters. That’s the only word I can think to use to encapsulate the moment. Like a ball being thrown at a mirror, her entire expression shuts down, replaced by a haunting despair. A part of me dies inside when she aims that despondency at me.

“You cheated on me?” she whispers.

“No!” I shake my head vehemently. “It wasn’t like that.” I curl my hands into fists at the unpleasant memory rushing to the surface.

“Then what?” she demands. “If you didn’t cheat on me, why do you feel such guilt? Why are you ignoring me?” Anguish emanates from her eyes, and I long to kiss the furrow between her brow. Her pain is my pain, it always has been.

“I don’t know what happened.” My voice is barely audible, nothing but a brush of air. “We were talking, and then she just…kissed me.”

I remember the shock when her cold lips touched mine. That shock was instantly replaced by panic and anger. I pushed her away, but not fast enough.

Emily still saw the kiss.

“You saw it,” I confess raggedly. “And you…well, you ran. And the next thing I know, we’re here.”

Getting my memories back is both a blessing and a curse. I don’t want to remember the torment I felt when I searched the castle grounds for her, calling her name. The pain flaying me open when I recall the betrayal in her gaze.

“Did you…” She clears her throat and turns away, almost as if it’s too painful for her to stare directly at me. “Did you kiss her back?”

“No,” I declare adamantly. “Of course not. I’m loyal to you and only you.”

Most of the gods and goddesses I know have had numerous relationships and affairs over the years, but not me. Never me. The thought is too surreal to even think about. I’m in love with Emily, the Goddess of Pain, and I’m determined to prove that devotion to her every damn day of my life.

She curses abruptly, kicking out at Avery’s overflowing hamper. “Who the fuck does Athena think she is?” she seethes, red blotches appearing on her cheeks.

“Athena?” I query, and when she whips her head to stare at me, I wish I would’ve kept my mouth shut. However, I’m determined to give her the complete and utter truth, even if that truth may destroy her. “Rebecca was the one who kissed me.”

Her mouth opens, closes, and then opens again. She seems at a loss for words, those large eyes of hers blinking rapidly. A single tear cascades down her cheek, and I don’t hesitate to kiss it away. She trembles, almost as if she wishes to cower, but she doesn’t. My girl is too brave, too stubborn.

“My best friend?” she whispers, voice soft. Sad. Broken. “That Rebecca?”

It shocked me as well. I’ve known Rebecca just as long as I’ve known Emily, and I always considered her a little sister.

At my barely perceptible nod, she releases a hushed sob. Lowering her face to her hands, she asks, “Do you have feelings for her?”

“No!” I capture both of her wrists, forcing her to turn towards me with tear-soaked eyes. “None. I promise you, Em. None. I’m in love with you and only you.”

“Then why are you hurting me like this?” she sobs. “Why are you pushing me away?”

“Because it’s my fault!” I snap, releasing her and pacing the width of the room. “We fought…and then we got dropped into this new world with no memories. I should’ve been there for you! I should’ve been the one who protected and cared for you all of these years, not Avery. I forgot about you! And it’s probably what I deserve, after all. I have to wonder if Helio played a part in this. Losing you…it’s karma for what I did and the pain I caused you.”

“Desmond—”

“I tried to kill