Go Away, Darling - Alexis Anne Page 0,28

flat on the counter, taking a deep breath before looking me in the eye with an intensity that knocked the air from my lungs. “From one artist to another, you’re not creating anymore. You’re producing. And I get it. Those celebrity portraits pay the bills. And by all means, pay those bills, girl. But you have to have creativity too, or else your art dies. Doing London’s books isn’t your art. It’s hers. You supply the visual vessel through which her narrative is told. And it pays the bills. The bills are paid, Liv. You are an independent single mother who is taking banging care of her kid. Where’s your creativity? Where’s your art?”

I was winded by my sister’s attack. Or intervention. Yeah, that’s what this was. A creative artist intervention. Truth being rained down on me whether I wanted to hear it or not. I married for safety. Put myself on a shelf. And lost my art along the way.

Who the fuck was I? I didn’t even know myself.

Suddenly Summer was beside me taking my hands, her voice low and soothing. “I love you. Please don’t hate me.”

“I don’t hate you.”

She searched my eyes, checking for the truth. “Our parents are cold, driven, selfish people. Their art is...crap?” She laughed and it brought a smile to my lips to hear the truth of that as well. “It’s pretentious bullshit. It’s designed to get praise from critics and sell to wealthy people who will never look at it again. That’s not real art and it’s not what you or I want to put out into the world. Remember?”

Oh, I definitely remembered our whispered promises under the covers of my bed while our parents screamed and fought. “Your music is beautiful.”

She squeezed my hands. “And your photography is breathtaking. The world needs to see your vision through your lens again. When was the last time you put out a project for you?”

The fact that I had to think about this spoke volumes. “Linc was three.”

“The Everglades wildlife project.”

I nodded. It won awards, appeared in magazines, and earned money to safely remove pythons from the Everglades. I was so proud of that project. And then I buried myself in motherhood and paying the bills.

Summer was also right about the bills. They were paid. I had my own money in savings, not just Beau’s. I was safe and I needed to stop living like I wasn’t.

I tucked Linc into bed and waited for his breathing to grow heavy, then like a teenager, I snuck out of my own damn house. Because I wanted to.

“Chris?” I hissed at the edge of his property.

He appeared out of the shadows, taking my breath away. His post game shower made his hair lighter and his smile was whoa.

“Get over here,” he urged, reaching for me at the same time he moved toward me.

And then I was in his arms and his lips were on mine. And holy hell what a kiss. I sizzled. My fingers were hungry, needing and wanting to touch him, to massage his neck and thread into his hair. And his seemed to be just as hungry, skating along my back and pressing me to him.

He ended the kiss by pressing his forehead to mine. It was so sweet. “I wish we could do this all night but I’m smashed, Liv. I can barely stay upright.”

He’d pitched the early afternoon game in New York, then the team hopped a plane home. He just got in. “How’s your arm?”

He smiled with his eyes still closed. “Tired but good.”

“You were kind of amazing.”

His eyes opened and found mine. “Only kind of? I’ll have to be even better next time.”

“Chris.”

“What? I want to impress you. I want you to gush that I’m amazing full stop.”

The things he made me feel were amazing. I felt young and alive. I felt the stirrings of ideas and dreams again. Not just about us, but in general. My creative mind had been asleep and with the cajoling of my sister and the rousing of my body thanks to this man, I was awakening.

This was special. We were special.

I massaged his neck as I kissed him, feeling his body relax and drift into mine. “Go get some sleep.”

He pressed a kiss to my forehead, then my cheek, then my lips. “I hate hiding. Kisses in the shadows aren’t nearly enough.” Then his lips dragged down my jaw and neck, stopping at my shoulder where he took a shuddering breath and stepped back.