too stunned. And then there was the Ativan. That was a good idea.”
“One pill,” she said.
“Of course. Who in their right mind would give him more?”
She could hear the threat in his voice. She wasn’t afraid of him. Not really. Not normally. But none of this was normal.
“So why did you?” he asked.
“I didn’t.”
“I’m not Gamache. I’m not the cops,” said Matheo. “You can’t lie to me. You know what I know. Or,” he leaned closer to her, “do you know more?”
“Don’t. You. Dare,” she whispered. More a hiss.
She was his size. And while she couldn’t take him physically, she could always take him intellectually. Not that Matheo was that dumb, but Lea was that smart. Clever. They all knew it. She knew it.
She had always managed to control him. Mostly, she knew, because unlike Matheo, she could control herself.
Though she felt that slipping now. It was all slipping away. It was as though they were caught in a mudslide, and going under.
They’d all lied to the police. They said they knew nothing when, in fact, they knew everything.
“We’re fucked,” said Matheo.
“Katie’s dead,” said Lea. “And you’re the one who’s fucked? Get your head out of your own ass. Stop thinking about yourself.”
“Oh, and you’re not?”
Lea held his eyes, trying not to give him the satisfaction of knowing he was right. Lea Roux had discovered something about herself that day.
When swept away by a mudslide, all she wanted to do was save herself.
God help me, she thought. She’d always hoped she’d be like the members of the band on the Titanic. Or a German hiding a Jew in the attic.
But now she knew better. When the iceberg struck, she’d toss children out of the lifeboat.
When the knock came, in the middle of the night, she’d point to the hidden doorway.
Yes, she thought. More than Katie had died that day. The cold carcass of the woman Lea thought she was, hoped she was, had also been discovered.
Still, maybe it wasn’t too late. Maybe there was still a heartbeat.
She’d had some time now to think.
Matheo had been right about one thing. The first person in had the advantage.
She looked at the carriage clock on the mantelpiece. Just after six. She could smell something delicious coming from the kitchen.
“I think I’ll go for a walk,” she said.
“It’s raining or sleeting or something out,” said Matheo. “Or were you planning a very short walk?”
He tilted his head toward the Gamache home, just across the road from the B&B.
Hearing his tone, she could almost taste the mud.
“You’re not going anywhere,” said Matheo. “And neither am I. We stick together.”
He studied his wife. But he was under no illusions. He’d always known, from the first time they’d met at the Université de Montréal.
She was effective. She was clever and clearheaded. And she was something else.
Lea Roux was ruthless.
But then, so was he. It’s what had gotten them to where they were.
CHAPTER 25
“Myrna just called,” said Reine-Marie. “She’s invited us over for drinks and information.”
“She has information?”
Armand was sitting on the sofa and looked at her over his reading glasses. He was surrounded by dossiers. Each file a précis of a department.
“Well, not exactly. She has the drinks, you have the information, mon beau.”
“Ahh,” he said, smiling.
“She seemed to think it was a fair trade, but I told her we couldn’t. Isabelle and Jean-Guy will be here at some point for dinner.”
Armand looked at his watch. It was past six, though with the sun setting earlier and earlier, it felt later. He’d changed into slacks and a shirt and sweater, and now he was sitting by the fire, making notes.
He took off his glasses and put his binder down.
The notes he was making weren’t about the case. Isabelle and her team were getting a handle on that. They didn’t need him.
His thoughts were about something else entirely.
The napkin sat rumpled on the sofa. It was from lunch earlier that day with Madeleine Toussaint, when they’d discussed the failure of the Sûreté, of all police forces, to control the drug trade. In fact, it seemed the more they tried to control it, the worse it got. Like ties that bound more tightly if you struggled.
But suppose …
He stared into the fire, mesmerized by its motion, almost liquid, certainly fluid. Letting his mind break free.
Suppose you stopped struggling? Suppose you just went with it. What would happen then?
He no longer saw the flames. At least, not those in the hearth.