The Girl is Not For Christmas - Emma V Leech Page 0,77

this imperfectly perfect family with all its madness and peculiarities and the love they all clearly had for one another. He would not allow Charlie’s heedless decisions to destroy their peace and happiness. There had to be a way. Whatever it was, whatever he must do, he would do it. For once in his sorry life he’d do something for someone else, for someone who deserved it, and yes it was for Livvy, but not just her. He looked about the table again, at the rosy cheeks and bright eyes of the children as they bickered and chattered and laughed. Beside him, George banged his spoon on his plate and grinned. King laughed and reached out a hand to the child, smoothing down an errant curl that stuck up in an irrepressible fashion. The boy’s hair was impossibly soft, silky and warm.

“Eat up, George, a little bird told me there’s jam roly poly for pudding if you clear your plate.”

George perked up at once and King smiled as the boy picked up another carrot and shoved it in his mouth, chewing with a determined expression.

King chuckled and then met Livvy’s eyes. He saw the warmth there, the gratitude and admiration, and something else, something too terrifying to contemplate, so he looked away and returned his attention to George.

Chapter Sixteen

15th December 1818.

A night brim full of surprises and regret.

There was no point in pretending otherwise. Livvy had fallen in love with the Earl of Kingston. She was also an idiot. Really, though, what chance had she, when the man was so patient with Harry’s incessant questions about London life, and Susan’s sighing over him, and the girls teasing him, and then… and then with George. Oh stop it, you hen-witted creature, she scolded herself, but to no avail. She’d peeked in on them earlier to see George climbing over King like a monkey scaling a tree. The poor man’s cravat was crumpled beyond saving, his dark hair tousled, and his boots scuffed from crawling about on the floor. Yet he was smiling, watching George with a combination of wonder and fascination. Was it any surprise her heart had turned to mush, and her womb had quivered with longing? She was only human, and there was only so much a woman could take. Then tonight, at the dinner table… Livvy pressed a hand to her heart, which felt like it had swollen to twice its normal size in her chest. This could not be borne.

She had never realised how different a man could be from her first perception of him. Livvy had always believed herself a good judge of character and yet she had condemned King as a vile seducer and a drunkard at first sight. How horribly judgemental she’d been. How naïve not to have wondered what might have brought him to that point. For now she could see the truth of him, a man who desperately needed to be loved, who wanted a family, a home. She wondered if he knew it himself, if he had realised what he was doing with the children, taking just a little of the affection they so abundantly offered him as though he was stealing from them. Livvy had seen him run away from them too, when it got too much, when he was overwhelmed by their happiness in having his attention, and by his own reaction to it.

She wished she could give him everything he needed, but even if things were different, she knew this wasn’t how it should be for him. He did not need another man’s family. He needed his own. Hopefully, he would see that in time. For now, though, he was here, and they could share something that might sustain them both until life shone a kinder light upon them.

Tonight.

She would go to him tonight and pray she could persuade him to be less of a gentleman before she spontaneously combusted. It wasn’t as if she had unrealistic expectations. Despite her foolish daydreams, she knew this was nothing more than a brief affair. After Christmas, King would leave, and she would escape to her aunt’s party and likely their paths would never cross again. It was for the best. For now, though, just until after Christmas, he would be hers. She would spell it out so there was no question of anything else, so that she would not frighten him off and give the impression she was hoping for more. They both knew it was impossible, but she would