to me. “Yes.” He clears his throat. “It’s no secret in Vegas that I…care for you.”
My heart skips a beat, first in momentary excitement but then it falls in disappointment. I care for you. The sentiment seems lukewarm, at best. I feel myself bite my lip. Now I know why he hadn’t responded to any of my attempts to reach out over the past weeks.
“What about my stuff?” I change the topic suddenly, desperate for him not to notice any trace of hurt I’m feeling. Meanwhile I grab a washcloth and carefully wipe my face, shielding myself from him. “I had bags in the car. Tony and Bobby’s car.”
“Already taken care of. Terry and the guys searched their car and found your bags. They’ll be brought here.” His voice is casual.
“And the people at Casino Diamond will be expecting me.” I’m determined not to let him see me falter.
“Don’t worry about that.”
“But my job. They’re going to think I’m a flake.”
“Trust me, Lilly. Your job is safe.”
“Okay.” I’m too tired and shocked by the day’s events to question him further. I can only assume that he’s pulled some strings. Maybe he had Terry call them.
Weary, I take the washcloth and start scrubbing my arms and then my shoulders. I’m just going through the motions, trying to find any excuse not to look at David. And I want to scrub every bit of the day’s experience off of me. But I struggle awkwardly to reach my back.
“Want help?” David’s voice is kind.
I nod, handing him the washcloth.
He slides over so he’s sitting next to me and carefully scrubs my back and shoulders as I lean forward, staring into the sudsy bubbles in front of me.
“You’re okay. You’re going to be okay.” He repeats the words he said to me in the car. Something about his gentle tone and touch sets me off and I feel the tears welling up inside of me.
I try my best but I can’t contain the emotion that erupts so I bring my hands to my face. “I was really afraid,” I whisper the words.
“I know.” David’s drops the washcloth and rubs my back in slow gentle circles. “But you made it through. You were incredibly brave, Lilly.”
“I didn’t feel brave. I thought I was going to die.”
“But you didn’t. You survived. And here you are, safe and sound.” He squeezes my shoulder gently. The touch sends a wave of reassurance through me. David’s touch feels like the house built from brick, stone and steel…not straw and lumber. His touch is the personification of safety. But it also sparks something else in me. Excitement.
“I survived.” I echo the words, sitting up straighter and rubbing the tears from my face. I feel a shock run through me like a jolt of electricity. I could have died but I survived. The realization washes over me, bringing a fresh surge of shock with it. And of something else—excitement? Gratitude? I’m not sure what, but it’s bringing me out of my sleepy state and leaving me with a new, heightened sense of being. I feel like I have to do something.
“Are you hungry? Or thirsty? Do you need anything?” David stands and looks down at me sweetly. “I can call room service.”
“No, thanks.” I look up at him, into those dark eyes that used to scare me so much. Now, they no longer do. Now they mean something else.
“You sure you don’t want anything?”
I don’t know. My brain is just repeating the realization I had again and again, like a drumbeat. I survived, I survived, I survived. I’m alive and I want to feel alive, in every sense of the word. What I really want right now is to fuck.
Without replying, I carefully stand up in the tub. Soap bubbles slide off my body, into the water.
“Want a towel?” David raises his eyebrows in surprise.
“No.” I carefully step out of the tub, so that I’m standing right in front of him. White foam still clings to parts of my body, which feel soapy and slick. And alive. “I want you.” And without any further ado, I put my arms around his neck and stand on the tips of my toes to kiss him.
After a moment of surprise, he returns the kiss, his tongue probing my mouth, his arms wrapped securely around my waist. But then he pauses, pulling back, staring down at me with a mixture of confusion and awe.