The Frozen Prince (The Beast Charmer #2) - Maxym M. Martineau Page 0,78

These days, I couldn’t be sure. When had my conscience been so loud? I couldn’t help but sulk as I returned to the pillow.

Sitting, I crossed my legs and placed my hands palms up on my knees. Closed my eyes and slowed my breathing.

Okay, so there’s this ball of energy. No, that’s not right. My fingers twitched. During my previous meditation sessions, Kaori had remained with me and guided me through the process with a soothing, peaceful message. But without her watchful eye, it was nearly impossible to focus.

Oh, yeah. A mist! It was a mist. I’m surrounding by this gentle mist, and every time I breathe it in, I… I shifted in place. Peeled one eye open. Keep your eyes shut, dammit. Forcing back a growl, I pressed my eyes closed as hard as I could. Focused only on my breath as it moved through my body. Listened to the steady, rhythmic sound of the waterfall crashing outside her windows.

Mist. Back to the mist. With every inhale, I invite this…healing? My fingers twitched. Not healing. Pacifying? Whatever. I invite this calming mist into my being. It starts at the top of my head and flows down through to my limbs. Time stretched by, and my muscles grew heavy. My breathing deepened.

And with every exhale, I expel… My mind whirred, and I felt my muscles tense all over again. A trickle of heat, of frustration that would give way to anger if I weren’t careful, started to form in my palms.

“It’s not about the words. Don’t focus on them so much as the process of pushing out that violent energy.”

Kaori’s advice bloomed in my mind. One of her many lessons I’d yet to grasp, apparently. But if it worked and made this meditation go by faster, then I was all for it. I stopped thinking about the exact words she’d chosen and instead homed in on my breathing. On the rise and fall of my chest. On welcoming gentle thoughts and eliminating my anger.

There we go. This isn’t so bad. I bet we’re already at least halfway there. Before I could stop myself, I opened my eyes and glanced at the weathered, standing clock beside the hearth.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Three lousy minutes. That was it. That was all I’d managed. Throwing my hands up, I abandoned my pose and started to pace. I eyed the door each time I passed it. I was in control now, right? I could handle some free time. Some fresh air. My feet slowed to a stop, and I shoved my hands into the pockets of my leather coat. My fingers grazed something cool, and my heart dropped.

Effie. Gently, I rolled the copper key between my forefinger and thumb. Ever since I’d been raised by Kaori’s legendary feline that fateful day, I hadn’t summoned my beast. I could feel the amplified anger, as if someone had set fire to my veins. I didn’t want to hurt Effie. Ever. But she’d come of her own accord outside Midnight Jester when Darrien’s men attacked, and she’d seen exactly what I’d become.

I extracted the key and held it out before me. Effie hadn’t fled at the sight of me. Rather, she’d rushed to my side despite it all. If she didn’t fear me, then… Thinking only of my beast and the bond between us, I focused on the key and opened the beast realm door. Effie came flying out without hesitation, her joyful birdcalls echoing throughout the room. She perched on my shoulder and rammed her head into my cheek. Then, playfully nipped at my ear.

“Hey, girl.” I craned my neck toward her and scratched beneath her chin. “We good?”

A happy chirp slipped through her beak. Relief chased away the tension lingering between my shoulder blades. For days I’d been working to control the monster within me. Right now, all I wanted was to simply be me. And I didn’t want to stay cooped up in this room for a moment longer.

With a wry grin, I gestured toward the door. “C’mon. We’ve got a little time before Kaori gets back. Let’s explore.” In a matter of seconds, I’d fashioned a small, slender pick out of shadows and opened the door. The corridors of the castle were quiet, but I moved quickly and kept close to the walls. With the help of my shadows, I suppressed the sound of my footfalls, descended the marble stairs and crept toward the exit. Effie remained perched on my shoulder,