help with anything else. And we weren’t about to ask what was in the purse, either. Some things were better left unknown, but still, I was sorta hoping she had some snacks. I’d forgotten to grab some at home and my breakfast was burning off fast.
We headed into the woods, following Ida Belle’s lead. I had a good idea where the house was in relation to where we’d parked but until I had as many years tromping through Sinful as Ida Belle did, it was more efficient to put her in front. Then Gertie was in the middle and I was rear. That way Ida Belle and I were covering front and back and Gertie was, well…Gertie. This way I could see if she got into trouble and immediately respond versus if she was behind me and my reaction delayed.
It didn’t take long to get to the tree line behind Gil’s house—or I guess I should start referring to it as Tiffany’s house—and we located an old log behind a large bush and sat on it while we unpacked. We got everything set up and then I stuck the microphone in the bush and directed it at the kitchen window.
“Interesting that Gil didn’t fence his backyard,” I said.
The neighbors on each side of the cul-de-sac had fences that bordered his property so that just left it wide open in the back. I mean, I didn’t have a fence either, but I left mine open for the view of the bayou. Gil’s view was just a bunch of trees and brush.
“He was probably too cheap to do it,” Gertie said. “He didn’t like to spend money on much besides himself.”
Ida Belle nodded. “And Gil wasn’t exactly the outdoorsy sort. You see that tiny patio and only one lounge chair on it. I guarantee you Tiffany is the only one who’s been out that back door in years.”
“Explain to me again why Judith has been pining for this guy her entire life?” I asked. “I mean, he didn’t like the outdoors and she’s a farmer. He didn’t shoot guns, and my guess is Judith is probably James Bond with a handgun and a pitchfork. He was only interested in acting and constantly playing a role and Judith is completely what-you-see-is-what-you-get.”
“Attraction is often one of life’s great mysteries,” Gertie said.
“I guess so,” I said. “Well, at least it’s convenient for us not to have to try to go over a fence.”
“Especially with Gertie’s history with fences and trees,” Ida Belle said.
“I’m fine with fences and trees,” Gertie said.
“Until you climb up on one,” I said. “Or have you forgotten that fall in Emmaline’s lawn?”
“That was a fluke,” Gertie said.
“You have more flukes in your life than you have liver spots,” Ida Belle said.
Gertie waved a hand in dismissal. “Do you hear anything?” she asked me.
I shook my head. “Not so much as a peep. Could be in another room on the opposite side of the house.”
“Or sleeping or not even at home,” Ida Belle said. “I guess we should have driven by and looked for her car before coming out here.”
“Not sure it would have made a difference,” I said. “The house has a single-car garage. I assumed Gil probably put his Mercedes in there and Tiffany stayed parked outside out of habit. But after that chicken stunt, she might be observing stricter safety regimens.”
Ida Belle nodded. “Good point. I was thinking—”
I held up a hand to stop her as I’d heard movement in the kitchen and flipped on the recorder. It sounded like the refrigerator opening. I lifted my binoculars and found a spot to peer through the hedge. The room was fairly dark with only the one window and the sun on the opposite side of the house, but I could see a shadow moving around inside. A couple seconds later, I heard Tiffany’s voice.
“I don’t know what to do,” she said. “This whole thing has gotten out of hand.”
There was a pause before she spoke again and I realized she was on the phone.
“Of course I want to leave, but the cops said I can’t,” she said. “I can’t believe this. I already found a great apartment in NOLA, right in the French Quarter. I wouldn’t even have to have a car. Everything is walking distance. And the best part is, if I decide I like it, the owner is willing to talk about selling it when the lease is up. But I’m afraid if I can’t get going on