I nod. I guide him across the room, to the window. Behind us, the city stretches out. I hope these windows are darkened, so nobody can see him.
I push him against the wall and kiss him.
I’m just so grateful. For everything. It’s been so long since we’ve touched like this. Far too long. My body craves it. It ramps up quickly, becoming hard and fast. Just when it starts getting really good, he pulls back an inch. I growl, then lean forward to kiss him, but he pulls back again. The part of me that craves him claws at my chest.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“We only have two days here, we should make it count.” He taps my chest. “Which for me means doing whatever you’d like. We could do anything, as long as you’re happy.”
I roll my eyes. “Come on.”
Being here makes me feel bold.
“We could…,” I say.
He smiles. “You want to?”
I nod.
“Can I, then?” he asks.
“Go ahead.”
He pulls my shirt off and throws it away. He turns back and kisses me. I stop him, and he gets the idea and quickly unbuttons his shirt. As soon as it’s undone, we crash together. We spin. He kisses me so hard my entire back touches the cold glass.
I move away, and we shuffle toward the bed, still kissing. We reach the edge of the bed and kick off our shoes. I take my socks off as quickly as possible and toss them away.
He does the same, then slowly takes off his shirt.
So here we are.
Both shirtless, our chests heaving.
He moves toward me.
“Hey, you,” he says.
“Hi.”
We kiss. As we do, his hands go down, his knuckles brushing my stomach, and he undoes my belt.
Or, he tries to. It gets stuck, bunched up in one of the loops.
I laugh and press myself against him. He’s really warm.
“Oh man,” he says, then he rests his forehead against my shoulder. “Did I just ruin this?”
“It’s just a dumb belt.”
I stand still as he figures it out, and he pulls off my belt. Then he kisses me, all while his hands are busy with my pants. He gets them undone, then yanks down, exposing the top half of my underwear.
He pauses.
“Is this okay?” he asks.
“Yeah. Are you good?”
“Yeah, definitely. This happened a lot faster than I thought it would.”
“Really?”
“I mean, no, not really.”
He smiles. It’s so cute I just have to kiss him.
I watch as he undoes his belt, then pulls his pants down. I do the same with mine. He’s wearing red-and-black-striped boxer briefs. I’m in plain gray. I readjust them.
Now we’re both in our underwear, but that’s it.
I glance at the bed, then back at him.
This might be a bad idea.
But since when have I cared about that?
“Do you want to?” he asks. His voice is kind of froggy. “Maybe we shouldn’t.”
“Why not?”
“I just want this to be special. Is it, for you?”
“Hey, dude, look at me. This is so special. This is, like, perfect.”
“You promise you’re telling the truth?”
“I promise.”
“Good. Because this is a big deal for me, too.”
From the way he sounds, I guess he’s a virgin, too. How has he not done it? Surely he’s had the chance.
“So you’ve never…?” I ask.
“No, I’ve hooked up a few times, but nothing like this. Have you?”
“Nope. Is that a problem?”
“Not at all.”
“Good. Um, sorry to bring this up, but I want to use protection, just in case. Is that okay?”
“Yeah, me too.”
He moves closer.
“Are we really going to do this?” I ask. “Right now?”
“I think so.”
He smiles at me, and I smile back.
Then he pushes me onto the bed.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
I wake up and am hit with an intense feeling.
I might not be sure about much at the moment. But I know this.
I love Jason.
I turn my head slowly so I don’t wake him. Dawn light streams in through the window that curves around the hotel room. It’s really pretty. I glance down. Jason’s beside me, fast asleep. He’s curled and facing away from me, his lower half covered by a white sheet.
Yep.
I love him.
Yesterday was perfect. After we hooked up, we showered and then just spent the day being tourists. We checked out the Hollywood Walk of Fame, the TCL Chinese Theatre, then took an Uber to Mulholland Drive. We ended the day with room service, and then we hung out in the hotel hot tub until the security guard kicked us out.
It was perfect.
The sight of him, in bed next to me, makes me feel overwhelmed.